1
00:00:00,042 --> 00:00:01,585
对，街口那个新高尔夫球场

2
00:00:01,669 --> 00:00:04,380
听说会有人工智能挥杆评估

3
00:00:04,463 --> 00:00:06,549
我不爱人工智能，即便打高尔夫球也是

4
00:00:06,632 --> 00:00:08,467
我觉得那是作弊，很像…

5
00:00:09,468 --> 00:00:11,387
我的天，梅丽莎，你还好吗？

6
00:00:11,470 --> 00:00:13,180
-没事，我很好…-别…

7
00:00:13,264 --> 00:00:14,682
我没事，不用…

8
00:00:14,765 --> 00:00:16,100
-好 -我没事，我很好

9
00:00:16,183 --> 00:00:17,977
你们看，没洒出来，没问题

10
00:00:20,021 --> 00:00:21,355
她以前一直都跛脚吗？

11
00:00:21,439 --> 00:00:22,898
不，她没有

12
00:00:24,316 --> 00:00:27,028
小学风云

13
00:00:27,111 --> 00:00:29,655
威拉德艾培公立小学

14
00:00:29,739 --> 00:00:32,366
团结、积极、创新、卓越、成就

15
00:00:36,704 --> 00:00:38,748
记得数学作业两面都要写

16
00:00:38,831 --> 00:00:40,207
不会的话要问妈妈

17
00:00:40,291 --> 00:00:42,918
经纪人，好久不见

18
00:00:43,002 --> 00:00:44,712
你早上送尼克来时我们才见过面

19
00:00:44,795 --> 00:00:47,715
话是这么说没错，但日子很漫长啊

20
00:00:47,798 --> 00:00:50,134
我现在是无业人士，你懂吧

21
00:00:50,217 --> 00:00:51,719
对了，你把我儿子分到你的班

22
00:00:51,802 --> 00:00:53,345
我觉得真的太赞了

23
00:00:53,429 --> 00:00:56,307
对，我为了他放弃几个未来首轮指名权

24
00:00:56,390 --> 00:00:58,559
-所以是重建年的概念 -我开玩笑的

25
00:00:59,685 --> 00:01:01,520
你真好笑，我喜欢你这样开玩笑

26
00:01:01,604 --> 00:01:03,105
这样聊天的感觉很棒

27
00:01:03,189 --> 00:01:04,482
明天见了，好兄弟

28
00:01:04,565 --> 00:01:05,566
-先这样 -先这样

29
00:01:05,649 --> 00:01:06,734
-先这样 -先这样

30
00:01:06,817 --> 00:01:07,902
先这样

31
00:01:07,985 --> 00:01:08,986
先这样

32
00:01:09,070 --> 00:01:10,321
-先这样 -先这样

33
00:01:11,113 --> 00:01:13,616
谢谢你教我数学作业，艾迪老师

34
00:01:13,699 --> 00:01:15,743
当然呀，贾巴利，这是老师的工作

35
00:01:15,826 --> 00:01:19,205
我知道数学很难，但我很骄傲你没有放弃

36
00:01:19,288 --> 00:01:21,373
我喜欢你的杯子，颜色好酷

37
00:01:21,457 --> 00:01:22,625
是吗？

38
00:01:22,708 --> 00:01:25,252
那你应该也会喜欢这支铅笔

39
00:01:25,336 --> 00:01:27,213
-谢谢艾迪老师 -贾巴利

40
00:01:27,296 --> 00:01:28,839
妈妈，是艾迪老师给我的

41
00:01:28,923 --> 00:01:30,299
好漂亮的铅笔

42
00:01:30,382 --> 00:01:31,592
-你有说谢谢」吗？-他有

43
00:01:31,675 --> 00:01:32,843
他很有礼貌

44
00:01:32,927 --> 00:01:36,180
是啊，他很喜欢你的课，他超爱你

45
00:01:36,263 --> 00:01:37,473
我真的很感恩

46
00:01:37,556 --> 00:01:39,683
我们就私底下说，因为他爸有点…

47
00:01:39,767 --> 00:01:40,935
你知道的…

48
00:01:41,560 --> 00:01:44,313
总之我很开心他有你当榜样

49
00:01:45,356 --> 00:01:46,357
-谢谢 -谢谢

50
00:01:46,440 --> 00:01:48,609
我感到很欣慰，自己能有正面影响力

51
00:01:48,692 --> 00:01:50,194
我以前低估了这一点

52
00:01:50,277 --> 00:01:52,613
但与学生建立感情是当老师最棒的事

53
00:01:54,240 --> 00:01:55,741
最糟的是他们的气味

54
00:02:01,789 --> 00:02:03,916
-你还好吗？-很好，好到不能再好

55
00:02:04,416 --> 00:02:05,501
好

56
00:02:07,378 --> 00:02:08,379
有人要泡咖啡吗？

57
00:02:08,462 --> 00:02:10,464
因为我也可以来一杯…

58
00:02:10,548 --> 00:02:12,383
算了，没事，我自己去泡

59
00:02:12,466 --> 00:02:15,970
我只是需要人替我拿杯子、咖啡壶、奶精

60
00:02:16,053 --> 00:02:18,556
还有汤匙跟一些糖

61
00:02:19,431 --> 00:02:22,184
我的杯子在左边的中层架

62
00:02:23,394 --> 00:02:24,603
-所以你需要帮忙？-不

63
00:02:24,687 --> 00:02:25,980
我没事，我很好

64
00:02:26,730 --> 00:02:29,233
梅丽莎，你明明就比昨天更严重

65
00:02:29,316 --> 00:02:31,026
-你需要看医生 -我很好

66
00:02:31,110 --> 00:02:33,612
我喝完咖啡就会好了

67
00:02:33,696 --> 00:02:35,990
你很好才怪，你昨晚在沙发上睡觉

68
00:02:36,073 --> 00:02:37,575
因为你没办法上楼

69
00:02:37,658 --> 00:02:40,161
你在塑胶椅套制造一堆噪音，所以我知道

70
00:02:40,244 --> 00:02:44,165
我看娇妻看到睡着的，雅各，你少罗嗦

71
00:02:44,248 --> 00:02:46,458
承认摔跤也没什么大不了啊，小妞

72
00:02:46,542 --> 00:02:48,335
我要是像你那样摔跤，我早住院了

73
00:02:48,419 --> 00:02:49,712
但我从不摔跤

74
00:02:49,795 --> 00:02:50,880
我从不倒下

75
00:02:50,963 --> 00:02:53,924
一堆马子给我电话号码但我从不主动联络

76
00:02:54,008 --> 00:02:55,759
-那就…-就那样…

77
00:02:55,843 --> 00:02:57,678
还没唱到那，但没差

78
00:02:57,761 --> 00:03:01,015
梅丽莎，你为何不去给医生检查？

79
00:03:01,098 --> 00:03:02,391
医生能做什么，芭芭拉？

80
00:03:02,474 --> 00:03:06,187
说我受伤了，治疗我的病痛，开药让我好转？

81
00:03:06,270 --> 00:03:07,980
-的确是这样 -好

82
00:03:08,063 --> 00:03:10,357
我才不想付一大笔给医生

83
00:03:10,441 --> 00:03:12,484
就为了听他说我的手臂和脚受伤了

84
00:03:12,568 --> 00:03:14,278
你的手臂也受伤？

85
00:03:14,987 --> 00:03:17,114
-那就是了 -而且，每次去看医生

86
00:03:17,198 --> 00:03:19,450
他们还会给一堆有的没的诊断

87
00:03:19,533 --> 00:03:22,453
你疼着腰进去，就会被装在尸袋里送出来

88
00:03:22,536 --> 00:03:23,913
上面还钉着帐单

89
00:03:23,996 --> 00:03:24,997
不了，谢谢

90
00:03:28,500 --> 00:03:29,835
谢谢你，强哥

91
00:03:30,502 --> 00:03:32,004
看来她放弃泡咖啡了

92
00:03:32,087 --> 00:03:34,590
说到这个，该出资买咖啡机罗

93
00:03:34,673 --> 00:03:36,050
请为社区做点贡献

94
00:03:36,133 --> 00:03:37,468
没钱不是借口

95
00:03:38,052 --> 00:03:39,053
我很乐意

96
00:03:39,929 --> 00:03:40,930
新钞耶

97
00:03:41,013 --> 00:03:44,016
但愿我身上有现金

98
00:03:45,851 --> 00:03:47,228
你是怎么回事？

99
00:03:47,311 --> 00:03:50,356
两周前，芭芭拉向我借了五块钱现金

100
00:03:50,439 --> 00:03:52,191
因为她要给美甲小姐当小费

101
00:03:52,274 --> 00:03:55,736
我当时刚好有，她又是我的偶像，所以我就借她了

102
00:03:55,819 --> 00:03:56,820
完全没问题

103
00:03:57,488 --> 00:03:58,822
但她还没还我

104
00:03:59,531 --> 00:04:00,783
这就有问题了

105
00:04:00,866 --> 00:04:03,244
干嘛不直接向芭芭拉要？不过五块钱

106
00:04:03,327 --> 00:04:04,578
就是因为这样

107
00:04:04,662 --> 00:04:07,498
我不想表现得小器和心胸狭窄

108
00:04:07,581 --> 00:04:08,666
而且这是原则问题

109
00:04:08,749 --> 00:04:10,668
我如果欠别人钱，我绝不会忘记

110
00:04:10,751 --> 00:04:13,420
有意思，因为你还欠我三百美金

111
00:04:13,504 --> 00:04:16,423
告诉你，我每天都惦记着这件事

112
00:04:17,633 --> 00:04:18,968
今天表现得很好，贾巴利

113
00:04:19,051 --> 00:04:20,719
但记得要练习短元音A的发音

114
00:04:20,803 --> 00:04:23,222
帽子、风扇、轻拍…」

115
00:04:23,305 --> 00:04:24,390
-爸爸！-对

116
00:04:24,473 --> 00:04:25,933
那个字也是

117
00:04:26,016 --> 00:04:28,227
-原来如此 -你是葛瑞格艾迪？

118
00:04:28,310 --> 00:04:30,145
-是 -我是唐奈

119
00:04:30,229 --> 00:04:32,147
-贾巴利的爸爸 -很高兴认识你，唐奈

120
00:04:32,231 --> 00:04:33,649
对，我也很高兴认识你

121
00:04:34,692 --> 00:04:36,777
听说你给我儿子一支铅笔

122
00:04:36,860 --> 00:04:39,446
对，我平常很少用那支铅笔

123
00:04:39,530 --> 00:04:41,282
-他很喜欢那个颜色，所以…-很好

124
00:04:41,365 --> 00:04:43,784
对，他妈妈说他很喜欢你

125
00:04:44,368 --> 00:04:46,328
你们整天都在聊天

126
00:04:47,162 --> 00:04:49,665
对，应该说是上课，但…

127
00:04:49,748 --> 00:04:52,167
我只是听说你发铅笔还干嘛的

128
00:04:52,710 --> 00:04:54,545
我不太明白现在什么情况

129
00:04:54,628 --> 00:04:56,839
所以我想了解一下状况

130
00:05:00,009 --> 00:05:02,511
听着，我们也许该好好聊聊

131
00:05:02,594 --> 00:05:04,388
找个贾巴利不在场的时候

132
00:05:04,471 --> 00:05:07,599
不…不，你无权替我儿子做决定

133
00:05:07,683 --> 00:05:10,227
这对他来说小意思，他见过更激烈的

134
00:05:10,311 --> 00:05:12,313
我们常一起看犯罪电视剧

135
00:05:12,396 --> 00:05:14,440
好，小孩子不应该看那种节目

136
00:05:14,523 --> 00:05:16,191
不好意思，你是说我不是个好爸爸吗？

137
00:05:16,275 --> 00:05:19,069
不是…听着，我明白你的意思，好吗？

138
00:05:19,153 --> 00:05:20,738
我能怎么做？

139
00:05:20,821 --> 00:05:21,989
少跟他聊天

140
00:05:22,614 --> 00:05:24,199
别再给他铅笔

141
00:05:24,283 --> 00:05:25,951
-就这样 -明白

142
00:05:26,035 --> 00:05:28,412
好，走吧，我们走

143
00:05:28,495 --> 00:05:29,663
那我就给他圆珠笔

144
00:05:29,747 --> 00:05:31,332
请问你在嘀咕什么？

145
00:05:31,415 --> 00:05:32,499
-没有 -没有

146
00:05:32,583 --> 00:05:34,376
你刚刚明明在对着镜头嘀咕

147
00:05:34,460 --> 00:05:35,794
你自以为死侍啊

148
00:05:35,878 --> 00:05:38,380
我不清楚现在什么情况

149
00:05:38,464 --> 00:05:40,049
我们才初次见面

150
00:05:40,132 --> 00:05:41,175
把我当无赖？

151
00:05:41,258 --> 00:05:43,969
-不，我没有这样说 -你当我是无赖？

152
00:05:44,053 --> 00:05:46,347
我想我们需要来个小型的亲师会

153
00:05:46,430 --> 00:05:48,182
很好，我看一下我的行程

154
00:05:48,265 --> 00:05:50,100
亲师干架会

155
00:05:51,435 --> 00:05:53,187
-什么？-我要打爆你

156
00:05:53,270 --> 00:05:55,731
我今天要去剪头发，但明天

157
00:05:55,814 --> 00:05:57,483
下午三点，外头见

158
00:05:57,566 --> 00:05:59,276
就我跟你

159
00:05:59,360 --> 00:06:02,404
给我带种，铅笔就免了

160
00:06:02,488 --> 00:06:04,198
走吧，贾巴利，回家

161
00:06:04,782 --> 00:06:05,783
他是在暗示你吗？

162
00:06:05,866 --> 00:06:08,077
不，他说得很清楚，他要打爆我

163
00:06:08,160 --> 00:06:09,620
-谁要被打？-葛瑞格

164
00:06:09,703 --> 00:06:11,872
-也该是时候了 -没有人要被打

165
00:06:11,955 --> 00:06:13,207
有位家长想打我

166
00:06:13,290 --> 00:06:15,167
-有位家长想干嘛？-打我

167
00:06:15,250 --> 00:06:16,835
你记得你们班贾巴利的爸爸吗？

168
00:06:16,919 --> 00:06:18,962
那小伙子非常血气方刚

169
00:06:19,046 --> 00:06:20,672
具危险性的血气方刚吗？

170
00:06:20,756 --> 00:06:22,966
男老师很常遇到这种事情

171
00:06:23,050 --> 00:06:25,135
尤其当孩子有位失职的父亲

172
00:06:25,219 --> 00:06:27,054
他们备感威胁，所以才威胁老师

173
00:06:27,137 --> 00:06:29,556
好，但我当然不会和学生的爸爸打架

174
00:06:29,640 --> 00:06:31,141
我可不是没教养的流氓

175
00:06:31,225 --> 00:06:32,726
你干嘛讲这种话？

176
00:06:32,810 --> 00:06:34,978
你就是这种态度，难怪这么欠打

177
00:06:35,062 --> 00:06:36,313
他稳输的

178
00:06:36,397 --> 00:06:37,564
那还用说

179
00:06:37,648 --> 00:06:39,274
不管怎样我还是要开盘下注

180
00:06:39,358 --> 00:06:41,568
你们怎能趁我不在，聊打架和赌博的事？

181
00:06:41,652 --> 00:06:43,779
我来了，别关闭赌盘

182
00:06:43,862 --> 00:06:45,280
没打架这回事

183
00:06:46,115 --> 00:06:47,741
唐奈也许只是心情不好

184
00:06:47,825 --> 00:06:49,034
他叫唐奈？

185
00:06:49,118 --> 00:06:50,911
唐奈对战葛瑞格！

186
00:06:51,412 --> 00:06:52,871
他光名字就赢定了

187
00:06:52,955 --> 00:06:55,833
你要用葛瑞格参赛？我以为我们决定叫巴尔的摩山猫

188
00:06:55,916 --> 00:06:57,918
听着，他只是说说而已，谁会…

189
00:06:58,001 --> 00:06:59,753
谁会为了剪头发延后对决？

190
00:06:59,837 --> 00:07:02,965
刚剪完头发的黑人是最危险的，你死定了

191
00:07:03,048 --> 00:07:04,758
大家都来珍妮的教室外闲聊啦？

192
00:07:04,842 --> 00:07:05,968
-要在Slack揪一下啊 -不

193
00:07:06,051 --> 00:07:07,553
有位家长想揍葛瑞格

194
00:07:07,636 --> 00:07:10,180
西费城唐奈想揍爆葛瑞格

195
00:07:10,264 --> 00:07:11,765
新鲜王子妙事多的开头就是这样

196
00:07:11,849 --> 00:07:13,851
不能让葛瑞格被送到贝沙湾，他负担不起

197
00:07:13,934 --> 00:07:16,145
好，够了，我不会跟他打架

198
00:07:16,228 --> 00:07:17,312
那你跟我们讲干嘛？

199
00:07:17,396 --> 00:07:18,730
我没有，我在跟珍妮讲

200
00:07:18,814 --> 00:07:22,276
听过沉量级冠军，冰人」米尔顿麦克罗瑞吗？

201
00:07:22,359 --> 00:07:23,360
-没有 -很好

202
00:07:23,444 --> 00:07:24,820
明天开始训练

203
00:07:24,903 --> 00:07:26,738
听着，我觉得你或许真的要…

204
00:07:26,822 --> 00:07:28,782
训练，训练这点子不错

205
00:07:29,283 --> 00:07:32,077
各位，我…等一下

206
00:07:32,161 --> 00:07:33,829
拜托，回来，重新开始

207
00:07:37,458 --> 00:07:39,835
早安，艾培小学的各位！

208
00:07:39,918 --> 00:07:42,838
-大家好 -你一夜之间变生化人啦？

209
00:07:42,921 --> 00:07:43,922
差不多

210
00:07:44,006 --> 00:07:46,675
准备好迎接美好的一天吗？

211
00:07:47,342 --> 00:07:48,635
咖啡，要喝咖啡吗？

212
00:07:48,719 --> 00:07:49,845
你看起来好多了

213
00:07:50,345 --> 00:07:52,389
-你去看医生了？-是啊…是啊

214
00:07:52,473 --> 00:07:54,975
我去看感觉良好医学博士医生

215
00:07:55,058 --> 00:07:56,810
冗词赘句，但请继续

216
00:07:56,894 --> 00:08:01,482
我在家里找到止痛药，现在好得不得了

217
00:08:01,565 --> 00:08:03,525
那是我的药，你看

218
00:08:03,609 --> 00:08:06,320
雅各希尔」，2014年的药

219
00:08:06,403 --> 00:08:09,740
他…也就是我…拔完智齿的药

220
00:08:09,823 --> 00:08:12,826
现在他…也就是我…感到非常不悦

221
00:08:13,744 --> 00:08:16,705
梅丽莎，这些药早就过期了

222
00:08:16,788 --> 00:08:18,415
把剂量加倍还是有效

223
00:08:18,499 --> 00:08:21,585
由于我现在好得不得了

224
00:08:21,668 --> 00:08:24,838
我要来拿高级的糖罗

225
00:08:27,174 --> 00:08:28,592
-我的天父啊…-太糟糕了

226
00:08:28,675 --> 00:08:30,594
…愿尔名圣！

227
00:08:30,677 --> 00:08:32,054
简直像颗烂李子

228
00:08:32,137 --> 00:08:33,972
梅丽莎，你需要看医生

229
00:08:34,056 --> 00:08:36,058
你或许感觉没事，但我们觉得很有事

230
00:08:36,141 --> 00:08:39,269
-简直不忍直视 -行了，天哪

231
00:08:39,353 --> 00:08:41,021
我会去找护士

232
00:08:41,104 --> 00:08:43,148
别再烦我了

233
00:08:43,232 --> 00:08:44,399
把药留下

234
00:08:50,781 --> 00:08:54,117
今天很适合吃包蝴蝶脆饼，没错

235
00:08:54,952 --> 00:08:57,454
唉呀，这是五块钱

236
00:08:58,497 --> 00:09:00,624
真是的，又一张五块钱

237
00:09:00,707 --> 00:09:01,833
-又一张？-拜托

238
00:09:01,917 --> 00:09:04,920
一、二、三、四、五张一块钱

239
00:09:05,003 --> 00:09:06,171
老天对我真好

240
00:09:06,255 --> 00:09:09,841
好，所以你总共有两张五块和五张一块

241
00:09:09,925 --> 00:09:11,385
也就是十五块

242
00:09:11,468 --> 00:09:12,844
五的三倍

243
00:09:12,928 --> 00:09:15,013
非常好，珍妮，你很会算数

244
00:09:15,097 --> 00:09:16,807
你的学生真幸运

245
00:09:16,890 --> 00:09:18,058
没错，非常幸运

246
00:09:19,434 --> 00:09:21,728
我会帮你做鸡柳和芝士通心面

247
00:09:21,812 --> 00:09:23,063
早安，贾巴利

248
00:09:23,146 --> 00:09:24,815
-丽莎，能跟你谈谈吗？-当然

249
00:09:24,898 --> 00:09:26,066
去坐好，宝贝

250
00:09:26,149 --> 00:09:27,317
好的

251
00:09:27,401 --> 00:09:31,905
我昨天见到贾巴利的爸爸，他好像对我有意见

252
00:09:32,698 --> 00:09:36,535
我想问你或贾巴利有在他面前提过我吗？

253
00:09:36,618 --> 00:09:38,036
-在唐奈的面前？-对

254
00:09:38,120 --> 00:09:40,163
拜托，艾迪老师，我跟他几乎不说话

255
00:09:40,247 --> 00:09:43,584
我只有告诉他，你对贾巴利多好、多体贴

256
00:09:43,667 --> 00:09:46,003
以及贾巴利有多爱你和多敬重你

257
00:09:46,086 --> 00:09:49,840
我还有讲到你是贾巴利的好榜样

258
00:09:49,923 --> 00:09:52,426
唐奈真应该把你当作好榜样才对

259
00:09:52,509 --> 00:09:55,887
然后我说他是败类，贾巴利说：没错」

260
00:09:56,680 --> 00:09:58,599
那他对我的威胁都合理了

261
00:09:58,682 --> 00:10:00,434
天哪，他威胁要揍你吗？

262
00:10:00,517 --> 00:10:02,394
唐奈就是那个样子

263
00:10:02,477 --> 00:10:04,896
老天，真是抱歉，他老爱惹是生非

264
00:10:04,980 --> 00:10:06,315
你不必道歉

265
00:10:06,398 --> 00:10:09,484
我只是松一口气，他不是真的想揍我

266
00:10:09,568 --> 00:10:11,361
不，不，他真的会揍你

267
00:10:11,445 --> 00:10:14,156
他说到做到，他最擅长惹是生非

268
00:10:14,239 --> 00:10:16,742
他揍你几下就没事了

269
00:10:16,825 --> 00:10:17,993
保护好你的后脑勺

270
00:10:18,076 --> 00:10:19,786
好，贾巴利，爱你，宝贝，要乖乖哦

271
00:10:20,787 --> 00:10:22,831
哇，我全都听见了

272
00:10:22,914 --> 00:10:24,666
我要你知道，同样身为教育工作者

273
00:10:24,750 --> 00:10:25,834
我挺你，兄弟

274
00:10:25,917 --> 00:10:26,918
知道吗？

275
00:10:27,836 --> 00:10:29,504
除非他超级高

276
00:10:29,588 --> 00:10:32,132
有粗壮的脖子和强悍的臂肌

277
00:10:32,215 --> 00:10:34,176
不用你帮忙，好吗？

278
00:10:34,259 --> 00:10:35,260
我应付得来

279
00:10:36,053 --> 00:10:38,055
我也不打算和学生的爸爸打架

280
00:10:38,138 --> 00:10:40,641
葛瑞格，拒绝接受无法保护你的颧骨

281
00:10:40,724 --> 00:10:42,559
-我们必须有计划 -你刚在偷听吗？

282
00:10:42,643 --> 00:10:45,771
幸好他有偷听，因为我们真的要面对现实

283
00:10:45,854 --> 00:10:48,607
-这家伙可能真的想伤害你 -你们为什么都跑来我的教室？

284
00:10:48,690 --> 00:10:51,026
葛瑞格，我们在想办法替你保命，快跟上

285
00:10:51,109 --> 00:10:52,486
我想进来就进来

286
00:10:52,569 --> 00:10:55,864
你们打架前，我乔装成混混并袭击你

287
00:10:55,947 --> 00:10:58,742
你先扁我，贾巴利的爸爸看到你这么杀

288
00:10:58,825 --> 00:11:00,577
就会在决斗前三思而后行

289
00:11:00,661 --> 00:11:01,662
-没错 -对

290
00:11:01,745 --> 00:11:03,080
决定了，我们先海扁雅各

291
00:11:03,163 --> 00:11:05,540
根本不会有打架这件事

292
00:11:07,918 --> 00:11:09,211
对吧？

293
00:11:09,294 --> 00:11:11,755
没错，当然不会

294
00:11:11,838 --> 00:11:16,343
但也许你可以每天提早五分钟离开教室

295
00:11:16,426 --> 00:11:19,054
确保接下来的这学年安全无虞

296
00:11:19,137 --> 00:11:20,138
孩子们很坚强的

297
00:11:20,222 --> 00:11:22,140
听着，我不会在放学前逃跑

298
00:11:22,224 --> 00:11:25,185
但我也不会跟他打架

299
00:11:26,103 --> 00:11:27,187
-好 -好

300
00:11:27,270 --> 00:11:30,649
但如果真的要打，我一定出手相助

301
00:11:31,233 --> 00:11:32,818
我会带上我的CSI和迈阿密

302
00:11:32,901 --> 00:11:35,362
好，葛瑞格不需要你帮忙，他很壮

303
00:11:35,445 --> 00:11:36,947
-好，跟我打一场 -你在这啊

304
00:11:37,030 --> 00:11:38,824
我整个早上都在洛基阶梯等你耶

305
00:11:38,907 --> 00:11:40,158
不来也传个信息吧

306
00:11:40,242 --> 00:11:41,576
吃这个

307
00:11:41,660 --> 00:11:42,994
-准备打牛肉 -对

308
00:11:43,078 --> 00:11:44,413
-你要这样…-出去

309
00:11:44,496 --> 00:11:45,497
好吧

310
00:11:46,331 --> 00:11:47,833
-真有趣 -什么？

311
00:11:47,916 --> 00:11:49,126
我的心脏有什么问题？

312
00:11:49,626 --> 00:11:53,964
我不确定，但听起来你需要看医生

313
00:11:54,047 --> 00:11:55,549
不要再浪费我的时间了

314
00:11:55,632 --> 00:11:56,717
又来了

315
00:11:56,800 --> 00:11:57,968
你全身问题一堆

316
00:11:58,051 --> 00:12:01,304
你要我怎样，打给你妈，叫你回家？

317
00:12:01,388 --> 00:12:03,598
-对，我真想回家 -你必须看医生

318
00:12:03,682 --> 00:12:07,644
否则你的身体会因过度代偿出现更多问题

319
00:12:08,228 --> 00:12:09,354
你又知道了

320
00:12:10,230 --> 00:12:11,523
我的背！

321
00:12:13,024 --> 00:12:15,444
我觉得你比我更需要这个

322
00:12:17,154 --> 00:12:18,238
那个…

323
00:12:19,489 --> 00:12:20,657
嗨，芭芭拉

324
00:12:21,700 --> 00:12:22,701
嗨

325
00:12:22,784 --> 00:12:26,037
我只是想来跟你分享最新科技

326
00:12:28,039 --> 00:12:30,500
你听过Venmo这个新服务吗？

327
00:12:30,584 --> 00:12:33,003
看到芭芭拉吃蝴蝶脆饼令我感到很不爽

328
00:12:33,086 --> 00:12:34,921
因为她还欠我五块钱

329
00:12:35,005 --> 00:12:38,508
而且她一块都没分我吃，太扯了，我超爱蝴蝶脆饼

330
00:12:38,592 --> 00:12:39,843
大家都知道

331
00:12:39,926 --> 00:12:42,387
那种饼小巧可爱，形状卷曲

332
00:12:42,471 --> 00:12:44,765
呛辣够味，跟我受委屈时一样

333
00:12:44,848 --> 00:12:46,349
所以我得有所行动

334
00:12:46,433 --> 00:12:48,852
我知道Menvo」，珍妮

335
00:12:48,935 --> 00:12:50,854
我有时会转几块钱给梅丽莎

336
00:12:50,937 --> 00:12:52,898
附带表情符号，就为了打招呼

337
00:12:52,981 --> 00:12:56,818
有时我给杰瑞德发一分钱，和一分钱的表情符号，就为了跟他说

338
00:12:56,902 --> 00:12:58,236
一分钱买你的想法」

339
00:12:59,446 --> 00:13:00,447
了解

340
00:13:00,530 --> 00:13:02,365
你知道可以免费传表情符号吧？

341
00:13:02,449 --> 00:13:03,825
我还真不知道

342
00:13:05,327 --> 00:13:09,664
如果你想转钱给别人，你完全可以这么做

343
00:13:10,624 --> 00:13:12,292
我们有彼此的Venmo吗？

344
00:13:12,375 --> 00:13:13,668
因为你猜不到我的账号

345
00:13:13,752 --> 00:13:15,253
就是珍妮蒂格

346
00:13:15,337 --> 00:13:18,173
我的显图就穿着这套洋装

347
00:13:18,256 --> 00:13:19,466
因为我放我的照片

348
00:13:19,549 --> 00:13:22,135
所以你有空的话可以找找看

349
00:13:23,386 --> 00:13:25,806
谢谢你提醒我

350
00:13:25,889 --> 00:13:28,850
我打算给我的教会发个祈祷的表情符号

351
00:13:28,934 --> 00:13:33,021
以及一百块钱，因为现在都数字化了

352
00:13:33,104 --> 00:13:35,065
祂会数字化地保佑我吗？

353
00:13:39,528 --> 00:13:40,695
嗨，儿子

354
00:13:40,779 --> 00:13:41,780
嗨，爸爸

355
00:13:42,614 --> 00:13:43,698
我需要一点建议

356
00:13:43,782 --> 00:13:46,159
我在上班，但刚好在休息

357
00:13:46,243 --> 00:13:47,452
-怎么回事？-就是…

358
00:13:47,536 --> 00:13:50,497
我有位学生家长

359
00:13:51,665 --> 00:13:54,084
想跟我发生肢体冲突

360
00:13:54,167 --> 00:13:56,628
什么？这种事不应该发生

361
00:13:56,711 --> 00:13:59,673
谢谢，我也一直这么说

362
00:13:59,756 --> 00:14:01,299
你是这孩子的老师

363
00:14:01,383 --> 00:14:03,844
再说成年人也不应该打架

364
00:14:03,927 --> 00:14:06,304
没错！我觉得自己好像活在阴阳魔界

365
00:14:06,388 --> 00:14:08,974
我家艾迪才不随便跟人打架

366
00:14:09,057 --> 00:14:11,268
-没错 -但我们会还手

367
00:14:11,852 --> 00:14:14,271
你不能杵在那被当成草包打

368
00:14:14,354 --> 00:14:16,982
如果他先动手，你就别客气

369
00:14:17,065 --> 00:14:18,984
管他是不是学生家长

370
00:14:19,067 --> 00:14:21,027
出拳时臀部发力，像这样打

371
00:14:21,528 --> 00:14:24,155
懂吗？跟击倒佛雷泽一样，我教过你

372
00:14:24,239 --> 00:14:26,741
击倒佛雷泽」，是的，先生！

373
00:14:27,450 --> 00:14:28,577
好，爸，我要挂了

374
00:14:28,660 --> 00:14:30,787
打赢后记得跟我报喜，儿子

375
00:14:32,038 --> 00:14:33,707
一记重击，就像那样

376
00:14:34,416 --> 00:14:36,751
钟声作响，开打罗

377
00:14:40,088 --> 00:14:41,339
两人都没来？

378
00:14:41,423 --> 00:14:43,592
若赛事取消，庄家获得赌金

379
00:14:43,675 --> 00:14:45,302
那位好像就是他

380
00:14:45,385 --> 00:14:47,012
正是他，他连走路都怒火冲天

381
00:14:47,095 --> 00:14:49,890
抱歉，各位，这里有够难停车

382
00:14:49,973 --> 00:14:52,183
对，都怪街口那个高尔夫球场

383
00:14:52,267 --> 00:14:53,518
听说他们还要盖房子

384
00:14:53,602 --> 00:14:55,770
我敢说我们住不起那些房子

385
00:14:55,854 --> 00:14:56,938
说得没错

386
00:14:57,689 --> 00:14:59,107
他来了

387
00:14:59,190 --> 00:15:00,358
下来吧，公子哥

388
00:15:02,152 --> 00:15:03,904
葛瑞格，你不必这么做

389
00:15:03,987 --> 00:15:05,280
这由不得他，亲爱的

390
00:15:05,363 --> 00:15:07,782
听到他扳动指关节的声音吗？

391
00:15:07,866 --> 00:15:09,659
这男人心意已决

392
00:15:09,743 --> 00:15:11,995
你选择现身，真的非常勇敢

393
00:15:12,078 --> 00:15:14,122
老实说，还很迷人

394
00:15:14,706 --> 00:15:16,958
听着，你必须离开，他会杀了你

395
00:15:17,500 --> 00:15:20,587
他知道我在这工作，我只想解决这件事

396
00:15:20,670 --> 00:15:22,589
别担心，我会照雅各的计划行事

397
00:15:22,672 --> 00:15:24,049
这让我更担心了

398
00:15:24,132 --> 00:15:25,133
我走投无路了

399
00:15:25,842 --> 00:15:27,427
喂，葛瑞格艾迪

400
00:15:28,762 --> 00:15:29,930
干嘛？

401
00:15:30,013 --> 00:15:32,766
听说你嘴巴不太干净

402
00:15:34,392 --> 00:15:35,936
大肆批评同性恋

403
00:15:36,019 --> 00:15:37,562
-什么？-没有，没有

404
00:15:37,646 --> 00:15:39,814
-照着演就对了 -不，不，暂停，别演了

405
00:15:40,607 --> 00:15:44,194
你先是跟我有过节，现在又恐同？

406
00:15:44,277 --> 00:15:45,695
-葛瑞格 -珍妮

407
00:15:45,779 --> 00:15:47,822
-我不知情 -我不…我真的…

408
00:15:47,906 --> 00:15:49,491
你的思想也太落伍了，葛瑞格

409
00:15:49,574 --> 00:15:51,034
你太糟糕了，老兄

410
00:15:51,117 --> 00:15:53,286
我表亲的表亲也许是同性恋

411
00:15:53,370 --> 00:15:55,664
所以我现在要为了自己

412
00:15:55,747 --> 00:15:57,958
为了贾巴利，为了他

413
00:15:58,041 --> 00:15:59,626
也为了法兰克海洋好好教训你

414
00:16:01,753 --> 00:16:04,464
快过来，开打了，他们跳过秤重环节

415
00:16:04,547 --> 00:16:05,548
好，我来了

416
00:16:08,468 --> 00:16:09,719
好的

417
00:16:09,803 --> 00:16:10,804
来啦

418
00:16:10,887 --> 00:16:12,931
我在你后面，强哥

419
00:16:14,182 --> 00:16:15,183
我快到了

420
00:16:17,394 --> 00:16:19,270
好，我会挺你，兄弟

421
00:16:19,354 --> 00:16:20,689
现在张开嘴说：啊」

422
00:16:20,772 --> 00:16:22,899
我在里面加了六包果倍爽，全都不同口味

423
00:16:22,983 --> 00:16:23,984
我不用

424
00:16:24,067 --> 00:16:25,485
你何时才要接受我？

425
00:16:27,153 --> 00:16:29,239
来了，我来了

426
00:16:29,322 --> 00:16:30,949
好，各位，即将开赛

427
00:16:31,032 --> 00:16:32,158
有人要最后下注吗？

428
00:16:34,160 --> 00:16:35,161
我押五块钱

429
00:16:35,787 --> 00:16:37,247
-真的假的？-来，好姐妹

430
00:16:38,707 --> 00:16:40,333
-心情好一点吗？-一点点

431
00:16:40,834 --> 00:16:41,918
等我！

432
00:16:44,963 --> 00:16:47,215
不接受十元以下的投注，穷鬼们

433
00:16:47,298 --> 00:16:48,758
我的钱不够

434
00:16:48,842 --> 00:16:49,843
对

435
00:16:50,677 --> 00:16:52,637
珍妮，能借你手上的五块钱吗？

436
00:16:54,889 --> 00:16:55,974
谢谢你

437
00:16:56,057 --> 00:16:57,892
拿去吧

438
00:16:57,976 --> 00:16:59,811
你真的得学会划清界线，珍妮

439
00:17:00,395 --> 00:17:02,147
对，我看到一种模式了

440
00:17:03,940 --> 00:17:05,358
可是她是芭芭拉

441
00:17:05,442 --> 00:17:07,402
我还没到，不准开始！

442
00:17:07,485 --> 00:17:10,030
好，好，没事

443
00:17:10,113 --> 00:17:11,614
只剩三阶

444
00:17:11,698 --> 00:17:13,033
来吧，你可以的

445
00:17:13,116 --> 00:17:14,117
小意思

446
00:17:16,536 --> 00:17:17,704
我需要看医生

447
00:17:17,787 --> 00:17:19,873
来，我们来算账

448
00:17:19,956 --> 00:17:23,251
我跟贾巴利说我去厕所，他大概以为我掉进马桶了

449
00:17:30,050 --> 00:17:31,384
你知道吗，唐奈？

450
00:17:31,468 --> 00:17:33,136
你如果这么想打我，那请便

451
00:17:34,554 --> 00:17:35,930
但我不会跟你打

452
00:17:36,014 --> 00:17:39,309
什么？别弃权哦，取消资格都还比较好

453
00:17:39,392 --> 00:17:41,352
我明白，你不高兴

454
00:17:41,436 --> 00:17:43,313
但我们都是为了贾巴利好

455
00:17:45,607 --> 00:17:46,608
那又怎样？

456
00:17:46,691 --> 00:17:50,403
如果我们现在互打，那对贾巴利不是好事

457
00:17:50,487 --> 00:17:52,030
贾巴利的表现非常好

458
00:17:52,113 --> 00:17:54,324
那是因为我在他眼中是很棒的老师

459
00:17:54,407 --> 00:17:57,368
如果我打你，那我在他眼中就会变调

460
00:17:57,452 --> 00:17:59,996
我不愿这种事发生，所以你想怎样就怎样

461
00:18:00,580 --> 00:18:01,706
上啊

462
00:18:01,790 --> 00:18:03,166
趁机偷袭他

463
00:18:09,130 --> 00:18:10,131
你知道吗？

464
00:18:10,924 --> 00:18:12,342
我大人不记小人过

465
00:18:12,425 --> 00:18:16,513
告诉你，要是贾巴利的成绩开始下滑

466
00:18:16,596 --> 00:18:20,225
我回来唯你是问，你等着挨揍

467
00:18:21,184 --> 00:18:22,310
懂吗？

468
00:18:23,436 --> 00:18:24,521
好吧

469
00:18:25,897 --> 00:18:27,398
好了

470
00:18:27,482 --> 00:18:29,192
发成绩单的时候见

471
00:18:30,819 --> 00:18:31,945
我的天哪

472
00:18:32,028 --> 00:18:33,905
我现在好亢奋

473
00:18:33,988 --> 00:18:37,492
非暴力解决冲突最令我热血沸腾

474
00:18:38,201 --> 00:18:39,369
对，逃得越远越好

475
00:18:39,452 --> 00:18:41,538
-他应该听不到了 -谢天谢地

476
00:18:41,621 --> 00:18:42,622
你看看你

477
00:18:42,705 --> 00:18:43,706
经纪人

478
00:18:43,790 --> 00:18:45,166
化解冲突专家

479
00:18:45,250 --> 00:18:47,710
什么都难不倒这小子，干得好，兄弟

480
00:18:47,794 --> 00:18:50,213
有谁看见我儿子吗？

481
00:18:50,839 --> 00:18:51,840
开玩笑的

482
00:18:51,923 --> 00:18:53,633
他就在这里

483
00:18:54,300 --> 00:18:55,677
-在我的心里 -他在哪里？

484
00:18:55,760 --> 00:18:57,011
-空手道课 -好

485
00:18:57,095 --> 00:18:58,346
庄家获胜

486
00:18:59,222 --> 00:19:01,558
别那个脸，刚好够钱买咖啡机啦

487
00:19:03,393 --> 00:19:04,727
-好耶 -也好

488
00:19:07,021 --> 00:19:08,273
梅丽莎

489
00:19:08,356 --> 00:19:10,525
-没事吗？-二级踝关节扭伤

490
00:19:10,608 --> 00:19:12,402
手腕瘀伤，膝盖擦伤

491
00:19:12,485 --> 00:19:15,405
就像我说的，小事一桩，幸好我去检查了

492
00:19:15,488 --> 00:19:16,656
痛啊！

493
00:19:19,409 --> 00:19:20,869
-还算正面吧？-算是吧

494
00:19:20,952 --> 00:19:22,495
对

495
00:19:22,579 --> 00:19:23,913
好，我先回教室了

496
00:19:23,997 --> 00:19:25,165
-祝有个愉快的一天 -你也是

497
00:19:25,248 --> 00:19:29,127
要是又有人想找你打架，要告诉我，好吗？

498
00:19:29,210 --> 00:19:30,879
记得我教你的那些穴位吗？

499
00:19:30,962 --> 00:19:33,131
对，我记得，我当时昏了约两小时

500
00:19:33,214 --> 00:19:35,133
我知道你是装的，你很不会演戏

501
00:19:36,342 --> 00:19:38,261
葛瑞格不只是一位好老师

502
00:19:38,344 --> 00:19:39,512
他还是一个好人

503
00:19:41,097 --> 00:19:42,182
我很开心他没打架

504
00:19:42,974 --> 00:19:45,768
不过如果真要打，他绝对有胜算

505
00:19:46,561 --> 00:19:47,729
我说过他很壮吗？

506
00:19:48,563 --> 00:19:49,814
他真的超威猛

507
00:19:51,232 --> 00:19:52,734
早安，艾迪老师

508
00:19:52,817 --> 00:19:54,485
早安，欢迎来上学，贾巴利

509
00:19:54,569 --> 00:19:55,987
-去位置坐好，宝贝 -好

510
00:19:57,197 --> 00:19:59,115
我听说你化解跟唐奈之间的冲突

511
00:19:59,199 --> 00:20:00,533
一定很不容易吧

512
00:20:00,617 --> 00:20:02,619
贾巴利的上一任老师曾对他大打出手

513
00:20:02,702 --> 00:20:03,953
上一任老师？

514
00:20:06,289 --> 00:20:07,498
-芭芭拉？-对

515
00:20:07,582 --> 00:20:08,583
没错

516
00:20:08,666 --> 00:20:12,378
但别担心，他什么都不知情

517
00:20:13,087 --> 00:20:16,174
-很好 -这些孩子有你真好

518
00:20:17,800 --> 00:20:18,927
再见，艾迪老师

519
00:20:19,010 --> 00:20:20,553
-再见，宝贝 -再见

520
00:20:20,637 --> 00:20:22,055
-要乖乖哦 -好

521
00:20:24,432 --> 00:20:27,060
我用这支铅笔写数学作业

522
00:20:27,143 --> 00:20:29,270
真的啊？我们来看看

523
00:20:30,980 --> 00:20:32,982
好，对，第三题做错了

524
00:20:33,066 --> 00:20:34,984
没关系，所以铅笔上才有橡皮擦

525
00:20:35,860 --> 00:20:37,111
好，我再试试看

526
00:20:37,195 --> 00:20:38,196
好

527
00:20:38,279 --> 00:20:39,781
和学生建立感情…

528
00:20:42,408 --> 00:20:43,910
依旧是这份工作最棒的一环

529
00:20:45,954 --> 00:20:50,500
梅丽莎，我真以你为傲，你终于看医生了

530
00:20:50,583 --> 00:20:52,877
对，我现在只希望他别再烦我了

531
00:20:52,961 --> 00:20:54,295
预约下次复诊

532
00:20:54,379 --> 00:20:55,880
别让腿部承受重量

533
00:20:55,964 --> 00:20:57,590
别再乱吃别人的药

534
00:20:57,674 --> 00:20:58,716
那是我今天早上说的

535
00:20:58,800 --> 00:21:01,135
-什么，他也对你这么说？-她要跌倒了！

536
00:21:01,928 --> 00:21:03,972
我的天哪！

537
00:21:04,973 --> 00:21:06,557
别忘了我有多身手敏捷

538
00:21:06,641 --> 00:21:07,725
-佩服 -老天

539
00:21:07,809 --> 00:21:08,810
-厉害 -佩服

540
00:21:08,893 --> 00:21:10,103
-我的天 -真厉害

541
00:21:10,186 --> 00:21:12,230
我说了，我从不摔跤

542
00:21:12,313 --> 00:21:14,649
我的反应堪比成龙养的猫，宝贝

543
00:21:15,358 --> 00:21:16,526
但是，对

544
00:21:16,609 --> 00:21:18,778
有吓到他们吧？很好

545
00:21:18,861 --> 00:21:20,697
因为不骗你们，真的超痛

546
00:21:21,447 --> 00:21:23,449
字幕翻译：Quill Lee