1
00:00:11,386 --> 00:00:12,721
我刚刚看到鬼，各位
I just saw a ghost, y'all.

2
00:00:13,805 --> 00:00:15,223
-有必要这样吗？-真的有鬼
-Why are we doing this? -It was a ghost.

3
00:00:15,348 --> 00:00:17,350
我经过转角，他就坐在那
I came around the corner…

4
00:00:17,517 --> 00:00:18,935
他好像是维多利亚时代的…
…like, Victorian era.

5
00:00:19,102 --> 00:00:21,146
老天，鬼增生了
Oh, my God. They're multiplying.

6
00:00:22,105 --> 00:00:24,232
嗨，我们想找柯尔曼校长
Hi. We're looking for Principal Coleman.

7
00:00:24,816 --> 00:00:26,234
今天是我们的儿子查理第一天来上学
It's our son Charlie's first day.

8
00:00:26,860 --> 00:00:28,319
我们在学区网站上注册的
We enrolled via the district website.

9
00:00:29,154 --> 00:00:30,488
你们也都看得到吧？
Please tell me you guys see them too.

10
00:00:30,572 --> 00:00:31,823
-艾娃 -这样吧
-Ava. -You know what?

11
00:00:31,906 --> 00:00:33,199
我去拿我的质子背包
-Let me go get my Proton Pack. -Hey…

12
00:00:33,283 --> 00:00:34,117
-别走 -别走
-Stop. -…hey. Stop.

13
00:00:34,200 --> 00:00:36,995
他们正在建一个大型PGA高尔夫球场
So they're building a big-time PGA golf course

14
00:00:37,078 --> 00:00:39,748
距离这里约十个街区，在吉拉德溪区
about ten blocks away from here, in the Girard Creek area.

15
00:00:39,831 --> 00:00:42,042
听说将对城市带来好处
It's allegedly good for the city.

16
00:00:42,125 --> 00:00:43,418
大家都兴致高昂
People are into it.

17
00:00:44,085 --> 00:00:46,129
费城多了很多新居民
And, um, new people are moving to Philly,

18
00:00:46,796 --> 00:00:48,048
西费城
West Philly,

19
00:00:48,131 --> 00:00:49,215
就为了去那里打球
just to play there.

20
00:00:49,883 --> 00:00:50,717
所以…
So…

21
00:00:50,800 --> 00:00:52,969
虽然老虎伍兹是知名的高尔夫球手
And while Tiger Woods is a notable golfer, mmm,

22
00:00:53,678 --> 00:00:57,932
但高尔夫球手的主要族群仍是…
the demographic of most golfers is mainly, uh…

23
00:00:58,641 --> 00:00:59,684
我们很期待来这里
We're so excited to be here.

24
00:00:59,768 --> 00:01:01,394
对，大家都建议我们去私校
Yeah. We were recommended we go private

25
00:01:01,561 --> 00:01:03,855
网络上几乎每个人都这样说
from, gosh, nearly every person and website we know.

26
00:01:03,938 --> 00:01:06,524
但我们想说，「公立学校才是王道」
But we were like, "Hey, public all the way."

27
00:01:07,525 --> 00:01:10,070
-所以…-很高兴你们来
-So… -Well, it's great to have you.

28
00:01:10,153 --> 00:01:12,947
-这可是前所未见 -对，我的教学生涯首例
-This is new, huh? -Yeah. First time in all my years.

29
00:01:13,031 --> 00:01:14,449
很高兴认识你们
Well, thrilled to meet you.

30
00:01:14,532 --> 00:01:16,868
纯粹是因为有新生加入，没别的原因
Just because it's nice to have a new student and no other reason.

31
00:01:16,951 --> 00:01:19,788
好，我是蒂格老师，我将是你的老师，查理
Okay. And I'm Ms. Teagues. I believe I'm your teacher, Charlie.

32
00:01:19,871 --> 00:01:22,248
欢迎，很高兴认识两位
Welcome. And it's so nice to meet you both.

33
00:01:22,332 --> 00:01:25,460
我是柯尔曼校长，也就是你们在找的人
And I'm Principal Coleman. The one you were looking for.

34
00:01:26,044 --> 00:01:29,339
我当然记得你们帮人模人样的小查理注册
Totally remember you enrolling the little and very real Charlie.

35
00:01:29,422 --> 00:01:32,926
真是开心，欢迎您们加入
And we are incredibly pleased to have you and welcome you

36
00:01:33,009 --> 00:01:36,429
艾培小学这个丰富多元的大家庭
to the rich, diverse tapestry of Abbott Elementary.

37
00:01:36,513 --> 00:01:37,347
你们会非常融入
You'll fit right in.

38
00:01:38,431 --> 00:01:39,808
我们被审查了吗？
Are we being audited?

39
00:01:39,891 --> 00:01:42,602
小学风云

40
00:01:42,685 --> 00:01:45,230
威拉德艾培公立小学

41
00:01:45,313 --> 00:01:47,941
团结、积极、创新、卓越、成就

42
00:01:52,278 --> 00:01:53,530
进来吧
Come on in.

43
00:01:53,613 --> 00:01:55,073
蒂格老师好
-Hello, Ms. Teagues. -Oh.

44
00:01:55,156 --> 00:01:57,534
艾迪老师好，希望你今天过得很好
Hello, Mr. Eddie. Hope your day is going well.

45
00:01:57,617 --> 00:02:01,246
目前都很好，谢谢问候，希望你今天也过得很好
It is. Thank you for asking. And I hope your day is going well as well.

46
00:02:01,329 --> 00:02:02,789
的确很好，谢谢你
It is. Thank you.

47
00:02:06,501 --> 00:02:10,255
葛瑞格和我尝试交往一段时间
So, Gregory and I did try out a relationship for a little bit,

48
00:02:10,338 --> 00:02:12,882
但最后进展得不太顺利
but in the end, it just didn't work out.

49
00:02:12,966 --> 00:02:15,635
所以我们又退回朋友关系
So now we are back to being friends.

50
00:02:16,761 --> 00:02:17,762
开玩笑的啦
-Just kidding. -Ha-ha!

51
00:02:17,846 --> 00:02:19,430
-上当了吧 -没错
-We got you all. -Yeah.

52
00:02:19,514 --> 00:02:21,432
-其实我们现在…正在交往 -我们在交往，对
-Well, so, we are, um… We're dating. -We're… We're dating.

53
00:02:21,516 --> 00:02:23,059
那晚派对后，我们就开始交往
After the party that night, we started dating.

54
00:02:23,143 --> 00:02:24,727
对，进展得很顺利
Yeah. And it's been going really well.

55
00:02:24,811 --> 00:02:26,813
对，我很快乐，也很想告诉大家
Right. And I'm happy, I would tell everyone,

56
00:02:26,896 --> 00:02:29,065
但珍妮明智地指出
but Janine so intelligently pointed out

57
00:02:29,149 --> 00:02:31,860
我们应该将工作与私生活分开
that we should keep our work and personal lives separate.

58
00:02:31,943 --> 00:02:34,279
-对 -我也同意
-Yes. Yeah. -And, I have to agree with that.

59
00:02:34,362 --> 00:02:36,573
如此一来，我们能自在地恋爱
And on top of that, we just get to have fun

60
00:02:36,698 --> 00:02:39,450
-享受这段只属于我们的关系 -没错
-and let our relationship be just us. -Yeah. Mm-hmm.

61
00:02:39,534 --> 00:02:42,412
所以除了雅各以外，没人知道我们的事
You know. So, aside from Jacob, nobody knows.

62
00:02:42,495 --> 00:02:43,329
没有人
Nobody.

63
00:02:43,413 --> 00:02:44,706
-我们都知道了 -我们都知道了
We all know.

64
00:02:44,789 --> 00:02:46,332
这也太明显了
It's just beyond obvious.

65
00:02:46,416 --> 00:02:48,501
那两个蠢蛋瞒得了人才怪
I don't even know how they dumbasses think they hiding it.

66
00:02:48,585 --> 00:02:50,336
-他们根本形影不离 -蠢蛋
-They stay in each other's faces. -Dumbasses.

67
00:02:51,045 --> 00:02:52,714
但我们会给他们空间，因为他们显然需要私人空间
But we're gonna let them have their space

68
00:02:52,797 --> 00:02:54,674
但我们会给他们空间，因为他们显然需要私人空间
because clearly they need it.

69
00:02:54,757 --> 00:02:57,427
老实说我不在乎，我自己的事都忙死了
Honestly, I don't care that much. I got bills, you know.

70
00:02:57,510 --> 00:02:58,720
说得没错
I know that's right.

71
00:02:58,803 --> 00:03:00,597
真要说的话，他们简直把我们当傻子
If anything, it's an insult to our intelligence.

72
00:03:00,680 --> 00:03:02,807
两人欲盖弥彰，有眼睛都看得出来
We know what two people look like when they hunch it hard.

73
00:03:02,891 --> 00:03:03,766
我们可不笨
We're not dumb.

74
00:03:04,767 --> 00:03:07,812
好了，孩子们，要把纸打开罗
All right, class. We're going to unfold our paper.

75
00:03:07,896 --> 00:03:09,731
然后会看到美丽的…
And we have a beautiful…

76
00:03:09,814 --> 00:03:11,482
-蝴蝶！-蝴蝶！
Butterfly!

77
00:03:11,566 --> 00:03:15,945
对，正确来说，是一只橙色硫积蝶
Yes. Specifically, an orange sulfur butterfly

78
00:03:16,029 --> 00:03:19,574
这是宾州的本土物种哦
which is native to Pennsylvania.

79
00:03:19,657 --> 00:03:22,035
新泽西见不到的，对不对？
Can't find that in Jersey, now can ya?

80
00:03:22,118 --> 00:03:23,870
-对！-对！
No!

81
00:03:25,622 --> 00:03:27,457
怎么回事…
What in the world…

82
00:03:27,540 --> 00:03:29,751
芭芭拉，你的水压低吗？
Hey, Barb. Is your water pressure low?

83
00:03:29,834 --> 00:03:33,213
有个孩子刚在我手上打喷嚏，谁知道有什么病菌，但我教室没水
Some kid just sneezed God knows what on my hand, and I got no water going on.

84
00:03:33,296 --> 00:03:35,089
我的也是
-Me too. -Ugh.

85
00:03:35,840 --> 00:03:36,841
艾娃
-Ava. -Oh.

86
00:03:38,384 --> 00:03:40,011
艾娃
Ava. Ava!

87
00:03:40,094 --> 00:03:41,429
怎么了？
What is going on?

88
00:03:41,512 --> 00:03:44,057
教室的水压比杰瑞德的铁质还低
The water pressure is lower than Gerald's iron.

89
00:03:44,140 --> 00:03:45,391
杰瑞德是谁？
Who the hell is Gerald? Look, it's the new golf course.

90
00:03:45,475 --> 00:03:46,893
是那个新的高尔夫球场
Who the hell is Gerald? Look, it's the new golf course.

91
00:03:46,976 --> 00:03:49,354
他们弄破一根水管，我们束手无策
They broke a water pipe. There's nothing we can do about it.

92
00:03:49,437 --> 00:03:51,439
我快受够高尔夫球场的施工了
I'm just about fed up with this golf course construction.

93
00:03:51,814 --> 00:03:53,149
每天早上堵车塞到不行，完全开不进学校
-Mm-hmm. -Just blocking up traffic,

94
00:03:53,233 --> 00:03:55,318
每天早上堵车塞到不行，完全开不进学校
making it difficult to get in here in the mornings

95
00:03:55,401 --> 00:03:57,403
-而且从早吵到晚 -就是啊
-and the noise all day long. -Yep.

96
00:03:57,487 --> 00:04:01,032
我还发现虫害跟鼠害变多，也是施工害的
And I've noticed an uptick in rodents and bugs. That's construction too.

97
00:04:01,115 --> 00:04:02,617
我今天早上杀了30只蟑螂
I killed 30 roaches this morning.

98
00:04:04,160 --> 00:04:05,870
31只，不能再这样下去了
Thirty-one. This has to stop.

99
00:04:05,954 --> 00:04:08,373
听着，我整天都在听你们抱怨
Look, I gotta listen to y'all complain all damn day.

100
00:04:08,456 --> 00:04:11,334
一下要书，一下教室要纸巾
We want books. We want paper towels in the classroom.

101
00:04:11,417 --> 00:04:12,543
你们肯定还想加薪
Bet you want raises too.

102
00:04:12,627 --> 00:04:14,587
-我喜欢钱 -我还在等纸巾
-I like money. -I'm still waiting on the paper towels.

103
00:04:14,671 --> 00:04:17,173
这是政府的计划，所以我也没办法
This project is backed by the city, so there's nothing I can do.

104
00:04:17,257 --> 00:04:19,676
别忘了明天的返校教职员会议
And don't forget, back-to-school staff meeting tomorrow.

105
00:04:19,759 --> 00:04:22,136
请准备好各位的年度目标提案
Have your presentations ready with your proposed yearly goals.

106
00:04:22,220 --> 00:04:23,638
行，好吧
Yeah, yeah. All right.

107
00:04:23,721 --> 00:04:24,931
32只
-Hey. -Thirty-two.

108
00:04:25,014 --> 00:04:28,434
你非得这么用力地杀死这些生物吗？
Must you kill these living creatures so forcefully?

109
00:04:28,518 --> 00:04:30,103
它没死，朝你那去了
I didn't get that one. It's headed to you.

110
00:04:31,479 --> 00:04:32,689
去死
Die. Die!

111
00:04:33,731 --> 00:04:37,610
我的提案是在每间教室种植物的好处
…my presentation on the benefits of plants in each classroom.

112
00:04:37,694 --> 00:04:39,070
希望能说服大家
Try to get people on board for that.

113
00:04:39,153 --> 00:04:42,240
听起来好赞，你真的…很有心
That is so amazing. I mean, it's very thoughtful.

114
00:04:42,323 --> 00:04:44,158
和你的相比还差得远呢
I mean, it's no school-wide field trip

115
00:04:44,242 --> 00:04:45,243
全校参观巴尔的摩水族馆也太酷了
to the Baltimore Aquarium

116
00:04:45,326 --> 00:04:46,494
全校参观巴尔的摩水族馆也太酷了
like your presentation.

117
00:04:46,577 --> 00:04:47,954
柯尔曼校长，你有空吗？
Principal Coleman, you have a second?

118
00:04:48,037 --> 00:04:49,914
我们的播客社团在进行事实查核
We're fact-checking for our podcast club.

119
00:04:49,998 --> 00:04:52,333
对，我们说希尔老师不识字，结果…
Yeah. We reported that Mr. Hill can't read, which turned out to be--

120
00:04:52,417 --> 00:04:53,251
不正确
Not true.

121
00:04:53,334 --> 00:04:55,378
那你为何每次都叫我们念给你听？
Why are you always asking us to read out loud, then?

122
00:04:55,461 --> 00:04:56,796
那你们现在想查核什么？
What are you fact-checking now?

123
00:04:56,879 --> 00:04:58,631
蒂格老师和艾迪老师正在交往吗？
Are Ms. Teagues and Mr. Eddie dating?

124
00:04:58,715 --> 00:05:02,135
何不报道其他更令人兴奋的趣事呢？
Why not report on something a little more exciting?

125
00:05:03,136 --> 00:05:06,306
例如天气之类的，对吧？天气变化很大
Like the weather. Okay? It does often change.

126
00:05:06,389 --> 00:05:09,350
事实上，老希的事还不只这样呢
In fact, there's more to the Mr. C story.

127
00:05:09,434 --> 00:05:11,853
例如他老爱听有声书
Like how he's always listening to audiobooks.

128
00:05:13,604 --> 00:05:15,523
我已经对珍妮和葛瑞格够宽容了
I was letting Janine and Gregory have their fun,

129
00:05:15,606 --> 00:05:17,108
但如果连学生都知道了…
but if the kids even know about them…

130
00:05:17,191 --> 00:05:19,152
我暑假在校长学校学到一件事
Look, from my summer at principal school,

131
00:05:19,360 --> 00:05:21,738
如果他们有麻烦，那我也会有麻烦
I learned that I'll get in trouble if they get in trouble.

132
00:05:21,821 --> 00:05:24,824
所以我得采取行动，我最讨厌做的事情就是采取行动
So I gotta take action, which is my least favorite thing to take.

133
00:05:27,076 --> 00:05:28,619
我喜欢你递披萨的方式
I like the way you passed that pizza.

134
00:05:29,203 --> 00:05:31,039
我喜欢你发牛奶的方式
I like the way you hand out milk boxes.

135
00:05:32,874 --> 00:05:34,375
这给你，拿去吧
This for you. There you go.

136
00:05:35,168 --> 00:05:36,210
还有你
And you.

137
00:05:37,754 --> 00:05:40,173
对了，我们也许要小心一点
Um, you know what? Maybe we wanna be more careful.

138
00:05:40,340 --> 00:05:43,718
因为说不定有人会看到我们的互动，引起不必要的误会
Because people might be watching and we don't want people to get the wrong idea.

139
00:05:43,801 --> 00:05:46,929
或许与其一直偷偷摸摸…
Maybe instead of always looking over our shoulders…

140
00:05:47,013 --> 00:05:48,139
偷偷摸摸欣赏你宽阔的肩膀
Our very broad shoulders.

141
00:05:48,222 --> 00:05:50,391
…我们该跟同事们说了
…we should just tell our coworkers.

142
00:05:50,475 --> 00:05:55,104
对，但我们不希望大家干涉我们的关系
Well, yeah, but we don't want everyone in the business of, like, what we are.

143
00:05:55,188 --> 00:05:57,440
别忘了人事部，那可不是闹着玩的
And we can't forget HR. I mean, that's very intense.

144
00:05:57,523 --> 00:06:00,318
对，我正想说，除非有人举报，否则人事部不会怎样
Yeah, I was thinking about that. HR's only an issue if somebody reports us.

145
00:06:00,401 --> 00:06:03,696
而且人事部从没来过这里
HR hasn't been to the school since ever.

146
00:06:04,781 --> 00:06:06,324
艾培全体教职员请注意
Attention, Abbott staff.

147
00:06:06,407 --> 00:06:09,994
明天学区的人事部代表将到校访查
Tomorrow an HR representative from the district will be here for the day.

148
00:06:10,078 --> 00:06:11,913
他将全天候为全体教职员服务
He'll be available to all staff members

149
00:06:11,996 --> 00:06:14,040
如果各位想投诉
if they feel the need to make any complaints,

150
00:06:14,123 --> 00:06:16,876
或对福利有疑问，或想提报任何事
or inquire about benefits, or report anything.

151
00:06:16,959 --> 00:06:18,211
欢迎提出各种疑难杂症
Anything at all.

152
00:06:19,420 --> 00:06:20,797
我知道是怎么回事
I know what that's about.

153
00:06:21,798 --> 00:06:22,799
你知道？
You do?

154
00:06:22,882 --> 00:06:24,258
我当然知道
Of course I do.

155
00:06:26,094 --> 00:06:27,678
有看到梅丽莎怎么对我调情吗？
You seen the way Melissa hits on me?

156
00:06:27,762 --> 00:06:30,348
她老爱说：「强森先生，我的垃圾满了」
She's always, "Mr. Johnson, my trash is filled."

157
00:06:30,431 --> 00:06:32,558
「强森先生，能帮我倒垃圾吗？」
"Mr. Johnson, can you please take out my trash?"

158
00:06:32,642 --> 00:06:34,977
「强森先生，这是你全部的工作」
"Mr. Johnson, this is your whole job."

159
00:06:35,061 --> 00:06:37,563
-她哈我哈得要命 -好
-Flirting her little ass off. -Oh.

160
00:06:37,647 --> 00:06:38,856
她完蛋罗
She going down.

161
00:06:39,690 --> 00:06:40,691
给她好看
Get her.

162
00:06:43,403 --> 00:06:47,782
雅各，别把你的豆子跟我的茶一起微波
Jacob, I am not letting you microwave your beans with my tea.

163
00:06:47,865 --> 00:06:50,451
芭芭拉，行行好，快要上课了
Barbara, please. We are running out of time before class starts.

164
00:06:50,535 --> 00:06:51,828
又不是我的错
It is not my fault road closures allowed traffic to back up.

165
00:06:51,911 --> 00:06:53,746
是道路封闭导致堵车，麻烦你把豆子拿走
It is not my fault road closures allowed traffic to back up.

166
00:06:53,830 --> 00:06:55,665
是道路封闭导致堵车，麻烦你把豆子拿走
Now, please, move your beans.

167
00:06:56,249 --> 00:06:57,083
谢谢
Thank you.

168
00:06:57,166 --> 00:06:58,167
我跟你们说
I'll tell you what.

169
00:06:58,251 --> 00:07:03,005
如果那个高尔夫球场是个人，而我不是奉公守法的公民
If that golf course was a person and I wasn't a fully law-abiding citizen,

170
00:07:03,089 --> 00:07:05,967
他们现在可能沉在斯库尔基尔河底了
they'd be sinking in the bottom of the Schuylkill River right about now.

171
00:07:06,050 --> 00:07:07,802
我的本生灯点不着，谁把瓦斯关了？
My Bunsen burners aren't working. Who shut off the gas?

172
00:07:07,885 --> 00:07:09,512
你在教室里煮鸡蛋吗？
Are you cooking eggs in your classroom?

173
00:07:09,595 --> 00:07:12,765
你用不着烦恼早餐科学的问题，到底是谁？
You needn't worry about matters concerning the breakfast sciences. Now, who did it?

174
00:07:12,849 --> 00:07:15,059
施工工人关掉所有电网的瓦斯
The construction workers turned off the gas to the entire grid.

175
00:07:15,143 --> 00:07:16,519
我也无能为力
Nothing I can do about it. Write a letter to the city.

176
00:07:16,602 --> 00:07:17,687
去跟市府抱怨吧
Nothing I can do about it. Write a letter to the city.

177
00:07:17,770 --> 00:07:19,939
这高尔夫球场有够恶劣，跟摩顿不分上下
I don't know what's more vile, this golf course or Morton.

178
00:07:20,648 --> 00:07:22,650
真他妈的烦死人了
Here are the pains in my asses.

179
00:07:22,733 --> 00:07:23,734
抱歉，什么？
I'm sorry, the what?

180
00:07:23,818 --> 00:07:26,988
各位，就像我说的，人事部今日查访，这位是华伦
Everyone, as promised, HR is here today. This is Warren.

181
00:07:27,071 --> 00:07:29,657
需要申诉的人，麻烦举手
So, if anyone has anything they wanna file, just raise your hand.

182
00:07:29,740 --> 00:07:30,658
不能跟我有关
And not about me, about other things.

183
00:07:30,741 --> 00:07:32,160
其他事可以
And not about me, about other things.

184
00:07:35,329 --> 00:07:36,706
没时间了
And we're out of time.

185
00:07:37,290 --> 00:07:38,291
换你了
And yours.

186
00:07:38,833 --> 00:07:39,834
不好意思
-Thank you. -Excuse me.

187
00:07:39,917 --> 00:07:41,043
借过一下
Excuse me.

188
00:07:41,127 --> 00:07:42,628
早上好，丹尼尔
Good morning, Daniel.

189
00:07:42,712 --> 00:07:46,257
今晚吃义式餐厅怎么样？去丝卡拉
Hey. How about Italian for dinner tonight? LaScala's.

190
00:07:46,340 --> 00:07:48,926
今天要跟隔壁同学相亲相爱，好吗，雅思敏？
We will be nice to our deskmates today, yeah, Yasmin?

191
00:07:49,010 --> 00:07:50,803
有奶油意大利面就可以
I'm good with that as long as they got buttered noodles.

192
00:07:50,887 --> 00:07:52,847
你哪一次没吃到奶油意大利面？
I never take you anywhere without buttered noodles.

193
00:07:52,930 --> 00:07:53,764
进来
Come on in.

194
00:07:55,141 --> 00:07:57,351
终于，能看着你说话的感觉真棒
There. It's nice talking to you while looking at you.

195
00:07:58,227 --> 00:08:03,274
说到这个，你打算何时跟人事部坦承我们在交往？
Which reminds me, when do you want to talk with/confess that we're dating to HR?

196
00:08:03,357 --> 00:08:04,650
我第五堂有空档
I have fifth period free.

197
00:08:05,318 --> 00:08:06,319
对…
Oh, yeah. Um…

198
00:08:07,236 --> 00:08:10,531
等返校提案后再去讲，如何？
How about, like, later, like, after the back-to-school presentations, right?

199
00:08:10,615 --> 00:08:11,699
其实…
Uh, actually…

200
00:08:12,575 --> 00:08:14,827
蒂格老师和艾迪老师，早上好
Good morning, Ms. Teagues. Good morning, Mr. Eddie.

201
00:08:14,911 --> 00:08:16,162
你记得华伦吧，珍妮？学区的人事代表
You remember Warren, right, Janine?

202
00:08:16,245 --> 00:08:17,371
你记得华伦吧，珍妮？学区的人事代表
-HR at the district. -Mm-hmm.

203
00:08:17,955 --> 00:08:22,084
珍妮，很开心又见面了，我们在你身上浪费很多时间
Janine, it's so good to see you after wasting our time at the district.

204
00:08:22,960 --> 00:08:24,128
我早跟雷诺督察讲过
I told Superintendent Reynolds

205
00:08:24,212 --> 00:08:26,214
你没那本事成为学区女强人
I knew you didn't have what it takes to be a district diva.

206
00:08:26,297 --> 00:08:28,132
对，很高兴又见面了，华伦
Yes. It is good to see you again, Warren.

207
00:08:28,216 --> 00:08:33,179
有什么事要向华伦报告吗？任何事都可以
Anything you wanna make Warren aware of, you can. Anything at all.

208
00:08:35,598 --> 00:08:36,474
这个嘛…
Well, um--

209
00:08:36,974 --> 00:08:41,646
没什么事，我只想说我很高兴再次见到你
Well, we got nothing. Uh… Except it is so good to see you, really.

210
00:08:45,358 --> 00:08:46,776
对，没什么事要报告
Um, yeah, nothing to report.

211
00:08:46,859 --> 00:08:48,444
好吧，他今天都会在
Well, he'll be here all day.

212
00:08:48,528 --> 00:08:50,738
如果你们突然想到什么事的话
If your memories happen to get jogged.

213
00:08:55,660 --> 00:08:57,411
我问一下，你还好吗？
-Real quick. Everything good? -Yeah.

214
00:08:57,495 --> 00:08:58,871
我们刚可以给个预告吧
We could've at least teed it up.

215
00:08:58,955 --> 00:09:00,873
对，不，没事
Yeah. No, everything is fine.

216
00:09:00,957 --> 00:09:04,544
只是…我们决定晚点再说呀
It's just, um… You know, like we said, later today.

217
00:09:04,627 --> 00:09:08,339
快上课了，这时丢出重磅信息不太合适
We don't wanna drop life-changing information before class even starts.

218
00:09:08,422 --> 00:09:09,423
对吧？
Right?

219
00:09:09,924 --> 00:09:12,969
那就祝你有个愉快的上午，艾迪老师
So, have a good morning, Mr. Eddie.

220
00:09:13,052 --> 00:09:14,929
早上好，你好吗？
How you doing?

221
00:09:15,012 --> 00:09:17,515
-早上好，蒂格老师 -大家早上好
-Good morning, Ms. Teagues. -Good morning, y'all.

222
00:09:18,933 --> 00:09:20,101
我明天要好好补觉
Gotta get some sleep tomorrow.

223
00:09:20,184 --> 00:09:21,519
对啊
Yeah.

224
00:09:21,602 --> 00:09:23,396
我咬鸡块的时候牙齿掉了
My tooth fell out in this nugget.

225
00:09:25,565 --> 00:09:27,400
你挤很多番茄酱耶
Wow. You used a lot of ketchup there.

226
00:09:27,984 --> 00:09:29,360
血，那是血
Oh, blood. That is blood.

227
00:09:29,443 --> 00:09:31,737
根本没解冻，吃点布丁，亲爱的
These are frozen. Have some pudding, hon.

228
00:09:32,446 --> 00:09:33,447
什么？
What?

229
00:09:34,574 --> 00:09:36,742
雪内，鸡块还没解冻，而且硬邦邦的
Shanae, these nuggets are cold and hard.

230
00:09:36,826 --> 00:09:39,829
谢谢哦，《费城询问报》以为我没发现？
Thank you, Philadelphia Inquirer. You don't think I know?

231
00:09:39,912 --> 00:09:43,207
瓦斯还没恢复，我们尽力加热了
The gas still isn't back on. We heated them the best we could.

232
00:09:43,291 --> 00:09:44,542
总不能空手上桌吧
We had to serve something.

233
00:09:45,418 --> 00:09:48,087
我真受够这个高尔夫球场了
Ooh, I have had it up to heaven with this golf course.

234
00:09:48,170 --> 00:09:50,715
这个学年不能再这样下去
We cannot live like this the rest of the year.

235
00:09:50,798 --> 00:09:53,301
告诉你们，我会去探听一下
You know what? I'ma do a little sniffing around.

236
00:09:53,384 --> 00:09:57,430
虽然我在费城的人脉已不比从前
Although, I don't really have the same connections I used to have in this city.

237
00:09:57,513 --> 00:09:59,515
在某程度上也算是一种进步吧
Which I guess in a way is a sign of progress.

238
00:10:04,937 --> 00:10:06,939
和人事部谈得怎样？
How'd the conversation go with the HR guy?

239
00:10:07,607 --> 00:10:08,816
完全没谈
Didn't go.

240
00:10:09,317 --> 00:10:11,360
是珍妮，她跟你提过吗？
It's Janine. Has she said anything to you?

241
00:10:11,861 --> 00:10:13,613
她是否不看重这段关系？
Is she, like, not that into this relationship?

242
00:10:14,196 --> 00:10:16,866
才不，她对你非常深情
Mm-mmm. No. She's definitely deeply in like with you.

243
00:10:16,949 --> 00:10:20,620
我知道你们还没准备好说出口，但我爱你们，你知道的
And I know you all aren't ready to say it yet, but I love you both, you know.

244
00:10:23,331 --> 00:10:26,584
我找不到我的演讲稿，一定是忘在家了
Um, I cannot find my presentation anywhere. I must've forgotten it at home.

245
00:10:26,667 --> 00:10:27,752
不能再印一份就好吗？
Can't you just print out another one?

246
00:10:27,835 --> 00:10:29,962
不行，那一份有我的笔记
No. That one has my notes, you know.

247
00:10:30,046 --> 00:10:32,298
这样我才知道何时该愤怒，何时该雀跃
It's how I know when to be angry, when to be jovial,

248
00:10:32,381 --> 00:10:33,549
何时该暂停让大家笑
when to pause for a laugh.

249
00:10:35,051 --> 00:10:36,510
看吧？所以…
See? So…

250
00:10:37,053 --> 00:10:39,847
总之，提案前我没空回家拿
Anyway, I don't have time to go home before the presentations.

251
00:10:39,930 --> 00:10:40,973
我完蛋了
This is gonna be bad.

252
00:10:41,557 --> 00:10:43,809
我们班上体育课时，我有空堂
Um, well, I have a free period when my kids are at gym,

253
00:10:43,893 --> 00:10:45,519
我可以去你家帮你拿
I could run to your place, grab it and head back.

254
00:10:47,063 --> 00:10:49,106
你人最好了
You're just the best.

255
00:10:49,190 --> 00:10:50,274
好
Okay.

256
00:10:50,358 --> 00:10:53,611
这是我家钥匙，你知道怎么进去
Here are my house keys, you know how to get in.

257
00:11:01,577 --> 00:11:03,120
她明明就超迷恋你
Seems pretty into you.

258
00:11:03,746 --> 00:11:04,664
你脸上有东西…
-You have a little, um… -Oh.

259
00:11:06,082 --> 00:11:07,708
-要帮你擦掉吗？-不，不用
-Here, you want me to get it? -No, don't.

260
00:11:07,792 --> 00:11:08,626
好
Okay.

261
00:11:09,502 --> 00:11:10,711
来吧
Come on.

262
00:11:11,629 --> 00:11:14,382
各位，全是非工会工人
Guys, guys. Nonunion workers.

263
00:11:14,465 --> 00:11:15,466
-什么？-高尔夫球场
-What? -The golf course.

264
00:11:15,549 --> 00:11:16,717
他们雇用工贼
They're using scabs.

265
00:11:16,801 --> 00:11:17,843
我表哥汤米
My cousin Tommy,

266
00:11:17,927 --> 00:11:21,180
他在当地的955分会做工，完全没被叫工
he does construction with the local 9-5-5, and they haven't been called.

267
00:11:21,263 --> 00:11:22,556
他们想贪小便宜
-Ooh. -They're cuttin' corners.

268
00:11:22,640 --> 00:11:23,641
只要向市府举报，这个球场就没戏唱了
One word to the city

269
00:11:23,724 --> 00:11:25,476
只要向市府举报，这个球场就没戏唱了
-and this course is dunzo. -Ooh.

270
00:11:25,685 --> 00:11:29,146
或者找我表哥干掉他们所有的宠物，给你们决定
Or we can get my cousin to kill all their pets. I'ma leave it up to you.

271
00:11:29,230 --> 00:11:30,606
-跟市府举报，梅丽莎 -打给市府，老天
-Call the city, Jesus. -Really, Melissa.

272
00:11:30,690 --> 00:11:34,151
好，别激动，所以我才给你们选项啊
All right. Easy. This is why I gave you options.

273
00:11:34,235 --> 00:11:36,487
感谢大家参与这场不可缺席的会议
Thank you all for joining this mandatory meeting,

274
00:11:36,570 --> 00:11:38,698
2024学年目标
2024 School Year Goals.

275
00:11:38,781 --> 00:11:41,909
首先，由芭芭拉霍尔介绍新数学教学法
First up, Barbara Howard on teaching new math.

276
00:11:45,621 --> 00:11:46,497
谢谢
Thank you.

277
00:11:46,580 --> 00:11:50,167
敬爱的同事们，我决定采取不同方向
Esteemed colleagues, I've decided to go in a different direction.

278
00:11:50,251 --> 00:11:51,711
数学没有变…
Math hasn't changed.

279
00:11:51,794 --> 00:11:58,426
变的是孩子和青少年的分泌物黏稠度
But what has changed, however, is the viscosity of child and adolescent rheum.

280
00:12:00,136 --> 00:12:01,637
鼻屎
Boogers.

281
00:12:02,805 --> 00:12:06,350
我知道听起来有点怪，但它们的黏稠度正在改变
Now, I know it might seem weird, but the consistency is changing

282
00:12:06,434 --> 00:12:08,978
这令人十分担忧
-and it is alarming. -Mm-hmm. Yes.

283
00:12:09,061 --> 00:12:09,895
葛瑞格呢？
Where's Gregory?

284
00:12:09,979 --> 00:12:12,523
他刚传信息说，道路封闭所以堵车
He just texted and said he's in traffic because of road closures.

285
00:12:12,606 --> 00:12:13,941
该死的高尔夫球场
Damn it, golf course.

286
00:12:14,024 --> 00:12:16,402
雅各，我不记得我的提案内容
Jacob, I don't have my presentation, okay?

287
00:12:16,485 --> 00:12:19,071
如果我无法提案，孩子们就去不成水族馆
If I don't do my presentation, the kids don't go to the aquarium.

288
00:12:19,155 --> 00:12:22,366
如果孩子们去不成水族馆，他们就无法通过大学入学测验
If the kids don't go to the aquarium, they fail the SATs.

289
00:12:22,450 --> 00:12:23,284
先深呼吸
Just breathe.

290
00:12:23,367 --> 00:12:25,035
芭芭拉还在讲鼻屎，你还有时间
Barbara's still talking boogers, you got time.

291
00:12:25,119 --> 00:12:26,495
总结来说…
In conclusion…

292
00:12:26,579 --> 00:12:27,413
完了
Damn it.

293
00:12:27,496 --> 00:12:32,126
…我建议我们的牛奶和胶水也要检测一下
…I'm suggesting that we get our milk tested and our glue tested, too.

294
00:12:33,794 --> 00:12:34,962
谢谢你，芭芭拉
Thank you, Barb.

295
00:12:35,045 --> 00:12:36,088
珍妮，该你了
Janine, your turn.

296
00:12:36,172 --> 00:12:37,047
什么？
What?

297
00:12:37,131 --> 00:12:38,716
快点，小不点，速战速决
Come on, pip-squeak, let's get this over with.

298
00:12:40,259 --> 00:12:41,802
好，没问题
Hmm. Okay. All right.

299
00:12:45,639 --> 00:12:47,141
给芭芭拉一点掌声吧？没错，对，为芭芭拉鼓掌
Hey. Let's give it up for Barb, right?

300
00:12:47,224 --> 00:12:49,268
给芭芭拉一点掌声吧？没错，对，为芭芭拉鼓掌
-Yeah, yeah, give it up for Barb. -Whoo!

301
00:12:50,936 --> 00:12:51,645
2024学年目标

302
00:12:51,854 --> 00:12:53,689
很好，也为自己鼓掌
All right. Give it up for yourselves.

303
00:12:53,773 --> 00:12:55,608
-珍妮 -好啦…好啦
-Janine. -Okay, okay, okay.

304
00:12:55,691 --> 00:12:59,361
我2024学年的目标是
So, uh, my school year goal for 2024

305
00:12:59,445 --> 00:13:03,407
带大家去巴尔的摩水族馆参观
is to take us all to a field trip to the Baltimore Aquarium.

306
00:13:03,491 --> 00:13:05,284
没错
-Hey. -Yes, yes.

307
00:13:05,367 --> 00:13:08,954
但在开始之前，我想我们得自问
But before I get into it, I think we should ask ourselves,

308
00:13:09,830 --> 00:13:11,332
什么是水族馆？
what is an aquarium?

309
00:13:11,415 --> 00:13:15,920
真的，大家仔细想想，谁才真正被困在水族箱里？
Really, when you think about it, and who's really in the tank?

310
00:13:16,003 --> 00:13:18,631
是鱼还是我们？
Is it the fish or is it us?

311
00:13:19,673 --> 00:13:21,050
谢天谢地
Oh, thank God.

312
00:13:21,133 --> 00:13:22,468
-嗨 -你放在你的厨房…
-Hey. -Okay. It was in your kitchen…

313
00:13:24,929 --> 00:13:25,763
玩具组
…set.

314
00:13:26,555 --> 00:13:28,182
-那个儿乐宝…-对
-The Playskool one… -Yeah.

315
00:13:28,349 --> 00:13:30,142
-你教室里给孩子们的玩具 -是
-…in your classroom for the kids. -Yes. Yes.

316
00:13:30,226 --> 00:13:31,227
你怎么满身是汗？
Why you all sweaty?

317
00:13:32,311 --> 00:13:35,564
因为我把教室温度调很高，有助于出汗
Uh, because I keep the temperature in my classroom very warm to sweat.

318
00:13:35,648 --> 00:13:37,483
-你最好把温度调低 -会的
-You better turn it down. -I will.

319
00:13:37,566 --> 00:13:38,526
你手上的钥匙是谁的？
Whose keys are you holding?

320
00:13:39,944 --> 00:13:40,778
是我的
Mine.

321
00:13:40,861 --> 00:13:43,656
所以那是你的钥匙圈？
So those key chains are your key chains?

322
00:13:43,739 --> 00:13:44,740
你喜欢灰姑娘？
You like Cinderella?

323
00:13:47,159 --> 00:13:48,369
我喜欢她象征的意义
I like what she represents.

324
00:13:48,452 --> 00:13:50,454
那上面写着「珍妮」的又是怎么回事？
How about that one that says J-A-N-I-N-E?

325
00:13:50,538 --> 00:13:51,622
对啊，葛瑞格？
Yeah, Gregory.

326
00:13:51,789 --> 00:13:56,585
你跟同伙最好跟大家解释一下吧？
Probably best for you and anyone else involved if you tell all of us why?

327
00:14:01,799 --> 00:14:04,468
什么，葛瑞格？我的天哪
What? Gregory. Oh, my God.

328
00:14:04,552 --> 00:14:08,806
你一定是不小心拿到我家钥匙，因为我放在教职员室，所以…
You must've grabbed my house keys when I left them in the teachers' lounge. So…

329
00:14:08,889 --> 00:14:12,184
所以我的车才发不动，原来是…
And they would be why my car didn't start. That--

330
00:14:12,268 --> 00:14:13,769
-你去车里干嘛？-对啊
-Why'd you go to your car? -Yeah.

331
00:14:13,853 --> 00:14:14,687
雅各
Jacob.

332
00:14:15,646 --> 00:14:19,733
他把钥匙忘在车上，所以回去拿
Um, he went to his car because he left his keys in there.

333
00:14:19,817 --> 00:14:21,443
那他怎么开车门的？
So, how did he get in his car?

334
00:14:21,527 --> 00:14:22,403
闭嘴
Shut up.

335
00:14:22,486 --> 00:14:24,822
别装了，我看到你们前几天，坐同一辆车离开
Give it up. I saw you two leave the other day in the same car.

336
00:14:24,905 --> 00:14:26,240
是这样的，我…他只是顺路载我，就这样
Well, y-you know, I--

337
00:14:26,323 --> 00:14:28,367
是这样的，我…他只是顺路载我，就这样
-He was giving me lift, that's all. -Mm-hmm.

338
00:14:28,450 --> 00:14:30,494
但你们隔天又一起来学校
Then you came back the next day together.

339
00:14:30,578 --> 00:14:33,497
那是因为我看到他走路，所以顺便载他
Well, that's because I saw him walking and picked him up.

340
00:14:33,581 --> 00:14:35,833
那为何我看到他从后车箱拿旅行包？
Then why did I see him take a duffel bag outta your trunk?

341
00:14:35,916 --> 00:14:38,460
好，我无论去哪都随身携带旅行包
Okay, I take duffel bags with me everywhere all the time.

342
00:14:38,544 --> 00:14:39,712
最好是啦
Of course you do.

343
00:14:39,795 --> 00:14:42,298
因为在场的各位都知道你们…
'Cause everyone here knows that you two…

344
00:14:42,381 --> 00:14:44,049
-对啊 -没错
Yeah. Mm-hmm.

345
00:14:44,133 --> 00:14:47,678
…用旅行包运送贩卖的毒品
…use the duffel bags to carry around the drugs you're selling.

346
00:14:47,761 --> 00:14:49,722
-因为你们在贩毒 -什么？
-'Cause you're selling drugs. -Doing what?

347
00:14:49,889 --> 00:14:51,974
不，我们没贩毒，只有上床
No, no, no. We are not selling drugs. We're having sex.

348
00:14:52,057 --> 00:14:52,892
这就对啦！
Yes!

349
00:14:54,435 --> 00:14:57,771
比我想的还糟，人们为了钱什么都做得出来
This is worse than I thought. What people won't do for money.

350
00:14:58,772 --> 00:14:59,815
我的老天爷
Mm-mm-mm. Lord have mercy.

351
00:14:59,899 --> 00:15:01,567
-谢了 -真丢脸
-Thanks. -This is a damn shame.

352
00:15:03,694 --> 00:15:05,404
-也许他们没发现，对 -不，已经露出马脚了
-Maybe they didn't catch on. -No, no.

353
00:15:05,487 --> 00:15:07,114
-也许他们没发现，对 -不，已经露出马脚了
-Cat's out the bag. -Right.

354
00:15:07,197 --> 00:15:09,783
要是我们再把马脚藏起来呢？
But what if we coax the cat back into the bag?

355
00:15:09,867 --> 00:15:13,454
因为我们可以再开一次会，告诉大家全是恶作剧，对不对？
Because we can call another meeting and tell everyone that it was a prank, right?

356
00:15:14,413 --> 00:15:18,876
珍妮，我一直要自己别担心，但我该担心吗？
Janine, I've been trying not to worry, but should I be worried?

357
00:15:19,877 --> 00:15:22,963
你对我不是认真的吗？还是…
Are you not into this? Or…

358
00:15:23,881 --> 00:15:25,215
葛瑞格，你疯了吗？
Gregory, are you crazy?

359
00:15:26,467 --> 00:15:28,761
-我当然是认真的，什么意思？-那到底怎么回事？
-Of course I'm into this. What? -Well, then what's going on?

360
00:15:28,844 --> 00:15:30,888
我理解你不希望别人插手我们的感情
I mean, I get wanting to keep people out of our business,

361
00:15:30,971 --> 00:15:33,891
这我们做得到，但我觉得大家都很支持
which we can do, but I think everyone's rooting for us,

362
00:15:33,974 --> 00:15:35,517
我不担心人事部，如果这是你的…
and I'm not afraid of HR, if that's what you're--

363
00:15:35,601 --> 00:15:37,102
对，也许我很担心
Yeah, but maybe I am.

364
00:15:38,729 --> 00:15:40,314
听我说…好，我上次正式公开某事时
Look… Okay.

365
00:15:40,397 --> 00:15:43,817
听我说…好，我上次正式公开某事时
The last time I made something "official,"

366
00:15:45,527 --> 00:15:46,528
没有好结果
it didn't work out.

367
00:15:49,573 --> 00:15:50,407
然后我…
And I…

368
00:15:53,077 --> 00:15:56,872
我真的…真的希望我们能有好结果
I really, really, really, really want this to work out.

369
00:15:59,166 --> 00:16:00,417
所以我才这么担心吧
So I guess I'm a little scared.

370
00:16:05,255 --> 00:16:06,840
但我们跟你的过去不一样
But we're not your last time.

371
00:16:08,884 --> 00:16:09,885
我们是这次
We're this time.

372
00:16:21,188 --> 00:16:22,523
我们去昭告天下吧
Let's tell the freaking world.

373
00:16:22,606 --> 00:16:25,567
-我准备好了，可以吗？-可以
-I am ready. Okay? -Okay.

374
00:16:25,651 --> 00:16:27,945
毕竟你刚才已经宣布我们上床了
Well, you just did when you told everybody that we had sex.

375
00:16:28,028 --> 00:16:29,363
-对，没错，大家知道了 -对
-Right, they know. -Yeah.

376
00:16:29,446 --> 00:16:31,198
-但…对，我们正式宣布吧 -正式宣布
-But, um… Yeah, let's make it official. -Let's make it official.

377
00:16:31,281 --> 00:16:32,449
-正式跟大家宣布 -好
-Let's make it official. -Okay.

378
00:16:32,533 --> 00:16:35,285
对，但提醒一下，这次别再扯到上床的部分
But, okay, real quick. This time, let's keep the sex part out.

379
00:16:35,369 --> 00:16:36,912
把性事分开，只字不提
Let's take the sex out. Don't need to say that.

380
00:16:36,996 --> 00:16:39,039
-没必要公开 -别说性事
-We don't need it. We don't need it. -Don't say sex. Don't say sex.

381
00:16:39,123 --> 00:16:40,582
别说性事…别说性事
Don't say sex. Don't say sex. Don't say sex.

382
00:16:40,666 --> 00:16:43,544
可以闭嘴罗，你现在边走进学校边说性事
You can stop saying it right now. You saying sex walking into a school.

383
00:16:43,627 --> 00:16:44,962
-好 -不太恰当，对吧？
-Yeah. -Not the best, you know?

384
00:16:45,045 --> 00:16:47,715
他们检查我，但大概花了半小时
So they checked me out, but it took, like, a half hour.

385
00:16:47,798 --> 00:16:49,299
来，能麻烦你签名吗？
Would you please just sign out?

386
00:16:49,383 --> 00:16:51,844
-我正在…-嗨，我是麦尔斯内森尼尔
-I am---Hi there. I'm Miles Nathaniel.

387
00:16:53,178 --> 00:16:54,513
你是啥，摩门教徒吗？
What are you, a Mormon? Look at this guy.

388
00:16:54,596 --> 00:16:55,514
看看这家伙
What are you, a Mormon? Look at this guy.

389
00:16:55,597 --> 00:16:57,516
我们没兴趣，滚吧，老弟
Yeah, we're not interested. Get lost, pal.

390
00:16:57,683 --> 00:16:59,977
对，我心中有神了，非常感谢，上帝保佑你
Yes, I'm saved. Thank you very much, and God bless you.

391
00:17:00,561 --> 00:17:03,397
不，我是吉拉德溪区高尔夫球场的律师
Oh, no, I'm an attorney with the fine folks over at Girard Creek Golf Club.

392
00:17:03,981 --> 00:17:05,315
我刚好在附近
I was just perusing the neighborhood.

393
00:17:05,399 --> 00:17:07,985
想说来打声招呼，毕竟我们快当邻居了
Thought I'd pop in and say hi, seeing as how we're gonna be neighbors.

394
00:17:08,068 --> 00:17:09,403
我知道你想干嘛
I know what this is about.

395
00:17:09,486 --> 00:17:11,989
我们通报市府，你想来示威吗，小白脸？
We call the city, and now you wanna dance, pretty boy?

396
00:17:12,072 --> 00:17:14,491
那句是赞美，你的皮肤又白又嫩
And I mean that as a compliment. Your skin is fantastic.

397
00:17:14,575 --> 00:17:15,743
你一定很有钱
You must be so rich.

398
00:17:15,826 --> 00:17:19,788
对，你听说我们得知你们雇用非工会工人
Yeah, so you heard that we heard that you're over there using nonunion workers,

399
00:17:19,872 --> 00:17:21,623
现在要来危机处理啦
and now you wanna do damage control.

400
00:17:21,707 --> 00:17:24,960
你那个小施工为我们的生活带来诸多不便
Your little construction project has put quite a strain on our lives.

401
00:17:25,044 --> 00:17:28,797
我们现在有个白人学生，你可不想惹他的父母吧？
We got a white child now. You wanna get his parents involved?

402
00:17:28,881 --> 00:17:29,715
好的，首先
First of all

403
00:17:29,798 --> 00:17:30,799
请容许我道歉
allow me to apologize

404
00:17:30,883 --> 00:17:33,177
为我们可能造成的任何不便
for any inconveniences we may have caused.

405
00:17:33,260 --> 00:17:36,555
我们旨在回馈社区，这违背了我们的初衷
That's the opposite of what we intend to do for our community.

406
00:17:37,139 --> 00:17:40,392
我们深信这个高尔夫球场能带来许多价值
We really believe the golf course can add a lot of value here.

407
00:17:40,476 --> 00:17:41,393
什么价值？
What value would that be?

408
00:17:41,477 --> 00:17:45,105
首先是房产价值会大幅提升
Well, property value for one thing. That will go up. Way up.

409
00:17:45,189 --> 00:17:48,484
所以，若您是房主，也许考虑卖房
So, if you're a homeowner, perhaps one who's looking to sell,

410
00:17:48,567 --> 00:17:51,195
退休后到热带岛屿居住…
and retire to say a tropical island…

411
00:17:51,278 --> 00:17:52,571
或是亚利桑那州
Or Arizona.

412
00:17:53,113 --> 00:17:54,865
我…个人偏爱沙漠
I'm… I'm partial to the desert myself.

413
00:17:54,948 --> 00:17:58,619
对，那些没钱赚的工会工人，一定会觉得很开心吧
Yeah, well, that's gonna feel real good to the union workers not getting paid.

414
00:17:58,702 --> 00:18:02,206
请原谅我们的疏忽，我们正在解决这问题
Please, forgive us for that oversight. We're amending that as we speak.

415
00:18:02,289 --> 00:18:04,625
我们周一将全面工会化
We will be fully unionized by Monday.

416
00:18:04,708 --> 00:18:08,337
原本预计周六工会化，但工会就这个样子
We would be unionized by Saturday, but, you know, unions.

417
00:18:08,921 --> 00:18:11,256
听着，我知道跟市府交涉很令人头疼
Look, I know how hard it can be to work with the city,

418
00:18:11,340 --> 00:18:14,051
所以如果各位未来有任何问题…
so if you have any future problems…

419
00:18:15,719 --> 00:18:16,720
那是什么？
What's that?

420
00:18:17,846 --> 00:18:19,431
一张500美元的礼品卡
-That's a $500 gift card. -Mm-hmm.

421
00:18:20,432 --> 00:18:23,143
我本来250美元就满意了，你出手真大方
I would've settled for 250, but this is classy.

422
00:18:23,227 --> 00:18:24,311
芭芭拉，我们一人一半
-Barb, you can have half. -Mmm.

423
00:18:24,937 --> 00:18:28,565
那我呢？我们才不跟你合作，懂吗？
Well, what about me? No, we are not on your team, okay?

424
00:18:28,649 --> 00:18:30,400
高尔夫球是单人运动
-Yeah. -Golf doesn't even have teams.

425
00:18:30,484 --> 00:18:32,027
抱歉打断你，我刚想到
I'm sorry to interrupt. I-I just remembered.

426
00:18:32,111 --> 00:18:34,571
我们有15台新电脑准备捐赠
We have 15 new computers that we're looking to donate.

427
00:18:34,655 --> 00:18:37,199
各位知道哪里需要电脑吗？
Do you guys know anywhere that could use them?

428
00:18:37,282 --> 00:18:40,369
我们很需要…不，慢着
Well, we could… we could use… No, wait.

429
00:18:40,452 --> 00:18:43,872
这样吧，捐20台，办公室好像还有多几台
You know what? Let's make it 20. Think I saw a few extra lying around the office.

430
00:18:43,956 --> 00:18:46,917
听着，高尔夫球场无论如何都会继续盖
Look, golf course is gonna happen no matter what.

431
00:18:47,000 --> 00:18:49,920
有电脑、没电脑都一样
It can happen with computers or without them.

432
00:18:50,003 --> 00:18:54,258
雅各，快和这男人握手言欢，要把握天上掉下来的礼物
Go ahead and shake the man's hand, Jacob, and recognize a blessing when you see one.

433
00:18:57,094 --> 00:19:00,472
捐25台电脑如何？然后别再破坏水管了
How about 25 computers and you quit messing with the water?

434
00:19:00,556 --> 00:19:04,685
这无法保证，但我能再捐几张人体工学椅
Can't promise that. But I can throw in an ergonomic chair or two.

435
00:19:07,104 --> 00:19:09,273
-你们在外面干嘛？-接受贿赂
-What y'all doing out there? -Taking bribes.

436
00:19:10,149 --> 00:19:12,151
好，别让华伦看到就好
All right. Just don't let Warren see.

437
00:19:12,818 --> 00:19:14,027
也替我争取好处
And get me something too.

438
00:19:14,695 --> 00:19:15,654
以你们为荣哦
Proud of y'all.

439
00:19:17,656 --> 00:19:20,784
你是说我不能在Etsy网络平台，拍卖学生做的珠宝？
So, you're saying I can't sell the jewelry that the kids make on Etsy?

440
00:19:20,868 --> 00:19:22,244
不行，我说这样违法
No, I'm saying it's illegal.

441
00:19:22,327 --> 00:19:23,453
儿童劳动法
Child labor laws.

442
00:19:23,537 --> 00:19:25,789
但如果他们享受其中，那哪算工作？
But is it really work if they love what they do?

443
00:19:29,168 --> 00:19:30,169
请坐
Oh. Please have a seat.

444
00:19:32,045 --> 00:19:35,132
好，我就直接切入正题吧
Okay, um… I guess I'll just jump right in.

445
00:19:35,215 --> 00:19:40,220
一切始于葛瑞格第一次来学校时，我带他参观校园
So, it all started when Gregory first got to the school and I gave him a tour.

446
00:19:41,263 --> 00:19:43,974
我当时觉得可以多多了解他
Um… I thought this is somebody I could get to know.

447
00:19:44,766 --> 00:19:47,311
然后我觉得，也许可以和他当朋友
And then I thought maybe a friendship with this guy.

448
00:19:47,853 --> 00:19:50,564
后来我觉得他满可爱的
And then I thought he's kinda cute.

449
00:19:51,231 --> 00:19:53,400
但他是我的同事，后来呢？
-Hmm. -But he's my colleague, so…

450
00:19:53,483 --> 00:19:56,445
这时你可能会以为我要讲后来怎么样
You know what? At this point, you would think I would go forward in the story,

451
00:19:56,528 --> 00:19:59,156
但我得先回溯到几年前
but I actually probably need to go back a few years, um,

452
00:19:59,698 --> 00:20:02,326
十一年级时，我终于进入青春期…
to 11th grade when I finally hit puberty.

453
00:20:03,202 --> 00:20:05,162
你们的关系是什么？
Mmm. What is your relationship status?

454
00:20:08,415 --> 00:20:09,499
他是我男朋友
He's my boyfriend.

455
00:20:11,668 --> 00:20:12,794
她是我女朋友
And she's my girlfriend.

456
00:20:12,878 --> 00:20:14,004
很好，这样就好了
Great. All done.

457
00:20:15,547 --> 00:20:17,341
-就这样？-就这样
-That's it? -That's it.

458
00:20:17,424 --> 00:20:19,509
你们没有权力失衡的问题，所以很单纯
I mean, there's no power imbalance here. So it's super easy.

459
00:20:19,593 --> 00:20:20,636
我只需记录一下
I just needed to record it.

460
00:20:21,637 --> 00:20:23,222
祝你们交往顺利
Good luck to the both of you.

461
00:20:23,972 --> 00:20:25,641
希望她不会像离开学区那样离开你
Hopefully she doesn't leave you like she left the district.

462
00:20:26,892 --> 00:20:28,685
好吧，我为你们感到高兴
Okay. I'm happy for y'all.

463
00:20:29,603 --> 00:20:30,395
真的
Truly.

464
00:20:30,479 --> 00:20:32,648
我只希望你们对这件事放聪明点
I just wanted you guys to be smart about this.

465
00:20:32,731 --> 00:20:35,692
但反正没事就好，更重要的是，我也没事
But now you're both safe, and more importantly, so am I.

466
00:20:36,318 --> 00:20:37,611
-谢谢你，艾娃 -谢了，艾娃
-Thank you, Ava. -Thanks, Ava.

467
00:20:37,694 --> 00:20:39,071
不客气
You're welcome.

468
00:20:39,154 --> 00:20:41,865
葛瑞格，我们的暧昧关系到此结束
Gregory, our situationship is over.

469
00:20:42,741 --> 00:20:44,534
-你为什么…-别跟她争了
-Why you---Just let her have it.

470
00:20:44,618 --> 00:20:46,203
对，好吧
Yeah. Okay.

471
00:20:48,205 --> 00:20:49,039
走吧
Let's go.

472
00:20:49,623 --> 00:20:53,043
总之，正如你眼前所见
So, in conclusion and as you can clearly see,

473
00:20:53,126 --> 00:20:54,378
他就是个混蛋
he's a scumbag.

474
00:20:54,461 --> 00:20:56,088
他违反人事规章了吧
That has to be an HR violation.

475
00:20:56,171 --> 00:20:58,090
叫你混蛋算客气了，老兄
Well, there's worse things I could call you, buddy.

476
00:20:58,173 --> 00:20:59,341
你们都给我成熟点
You two just need to grow up.

477
00:21:00,050 --> 00:21:01,718
-两位可以离开了 -天哪
-You can leave now. -God.

478
00:21:03,845 --> 00:21:04,513
下一组
Next.

479
00:21:05,597 --> 00:21:07,266
好，到底关我什么事？
Okay, I don't even know why I'm here.

480
00:21:07,349 --> 00:21:10,394
她心知肚明，太明显了
Oh, she knows why we're here. It's an open-and-shut case.

481
00:21:11,436 --> 00:21:12,354
证据！

482
00:21:14,439 --> 00:21:16,441
全是我给你的外卖菜单啊
These are all the takeout menus I gave you.

483
00:21:16,525 --> 00:21:19,444
都是餐厅建议，你一直要我约你吃晚餐
Uh-huh. And those were suggesting that we should go out to dinner.

484
00:21:19,528 --> 00:21:21,571
朕懂你的暗示，你好变态
I can read between the lines. You're sick.

485
00:21:21,571 --> 00:21:22,364
字幕翻译：Quill Lee

486
00:21:22,614 --> 00:21:24,366
-记下来 -好，记下了
-Write that down. -Yeah. Hmm. Got it.